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DOVE EVOLUTION | FEBRUARY 27, 2007

So have you seen this? What do you think?

(Yeah, because I had a bad day and don't feel like saying much more)

RELATIONSHIP RAMBLINGS | FEBRUARY 26, 2007

An interesting conversation with a friend tonight lead me to this question "Why is it considered normal to outgrow a romantic relationship, but not a platonic one?"

To sum it up, she was telling me that she finds herself being more and more irritated by some of her close friends - by what they do, say, and how they act. Not only does she feel annoyed, but she also feels sad for feeling this way, because while she can be nostalgic and remember the good times with these friends, her current status with them is that they drive her nuts.

Here is what I think (and what I told her). People can not be expected to have the same friends all their life, because people grow up and mature at different ages. Their preferences and interests change, and sometimes that means that you can no longer be "best friends" with someone. If one person has a life-altering experience and the other person remains on the same path, this may mean that they can no longer relate to each other (or if the two persons become roommates that can also kill the relationship). Obviously, this is not always the case! Some people remain friends throughout childhood into the last years of their life!

Furthermore, I think the vitality of a friendship depends a lot on the basis of which the friendship was formed. Let's say you become fast friends with someone at your office. You are going out for drinks with them once a week after work, then one of you gets fired. The chances that you are still going to meet for drinks once a week goes down.

There are also similar situations, like having a friend who you always talk to in class, but never again after the class is over. And sometimes people are friends simply for convenience - like they live in the same boring college town, but after they graduate, they do not keep in touch because they move on and make new friends in their new town.

So why do we feel so guilty for letting a platonic relationship die, when we know that the chances are pretty high that some of them will? I think if we aren't going to let them die, we should at least make room for new friendships, because that is what makes life fun.

The irony of all this is that I have been purposefully isolating myself the last four and a half years, and have not made many close friends. Don't feel bad for me, because I am not an unhappy person; it's just that I am starting to hang out more with some of the few friends I made now, and it is making me wish I would have hung out with them more over the last few years.

And then there is the fact that people are telling me I should have met Clare (the classmate I roomed with in Copenhagen) a long time ago because it is obvious that we are so compatible as friends.

The nice thing is that you have the power to choose which relationships to keep.

IT'S SUNDAY, AND I'VE BEEN STUCK INSIDE ALL WEEKEND | FEBRUARY 25, 2007

Have I waited long enough to complain about wanting to graduate NOW again?

No? Okay...

Lately I have been thinking about the qualities I have that would make me a good employee. For example, I am very reliable and have an excellent memory. If I say I am going to do something, I will remember to do it, and I will get it done on time (if it is solely my responsibility). I only noticed these things about myself because I have noticed that some of my classmates are... not reliable. They are consistently late to meetings. They don't do things they say they will. This is frustrating enough at school, but I don't even want to deal with it at work (although I know I will have to, because Steven already tells me lots of fun/pathetic little stories).

I have been hard to think of other qualities though (besides being hardworking, motivated, etc.). You know how some people are really skilled at one thing, like building architectural models or drawing in 3D programs? I am good at a lot of things - but not a superstar at anyone particular thing or another. I like to think this makes me well rounded, but I worry that it really means I need to learn more.

My experience is that most of my architectural colleagues know one thing (program or skill) really well, and if you have a question about it, you go to them. So I can be the go-to person on Adobe, AutoCAD, web design and model building, but I know I still have a lot to learn.

DATA'S WRATH | FEBRUARY 24, 2007

YOGA KICKED MY A$$ | FEBRUARY 22, 2007

I took a yoga class tonight with Clare and it was so much harder than I thought it was would be. I thought it would just be all this stretching and deep breathing, but we had to do a lot more work than that. We would get into these crazy positions then have to hold them. I was all shaky, and felt out of breath from doing it!

I felt really weak, dizzy and lightheaded during the middle of the class. I am not sure how to describe exactly how I felt, but I have had that feeling a few times this year and it is truly awful. My head feels like it is spinning and I feel too weak to stand up or even sit, I just want to lay down on the ground. This time it was accompanied by awful stomach pains and a migraine.

Clare and I had a lot of work we wanted to do after yoga, but I couldn't function. I ended up trying to sleep it off all night, just waking up now, close to midnight. I am trying to figure out what causes this awful dizzy spells, and I think they come from eating too little, exercising too hard, or taking too hot of a bath. Today maybe I ate too little, but I am not sure if I did, because I made sure to eat an apple one hour before class for energy!

It is such a hopeless feeling when this happens because I feel like I have lost all control over my body and there is nothing I can do but rest and grimace from the pain in my head. I seriously need to see a doctor about my migraines. I know some people who have shots they can administer to themselves when they get a migraine; maybe that is the best bet for me!

BOOK MEME | FEBRUARY 21, 2007

Incase you haven't noticed, I have been short for content this past... month. Happily, I stumbled across this book meme on kapgar!

1. Science fiction, fantasy or horror?If I had to choose, it would be Science Fiction - Star Wars only.
2. Hardback, trade paperback or mass market paperback? I prefer trade paperback, then I cover the cover in contact paper to protect them.
3. Amazon or brick and mortar? Definitely brick and mortar - I love to waste time (and $) in the bookstore! Steven can attest to this!
4. Barnes&Noble or Borders? Borders - it feels more modern to me, therefore makes me feel like the books are newer.
5. Bookmark or Dogear? BOOKMARK! I will hurt you if you fold the pages in my book!
6. Alphabetize by author, title or random? I organize my genre and size - large books of one genre on one side down to the small books of the same genre on the other side. I recently read that it is chic to organize books my color so I may try that.
7. Keep, throw away, or sell? Always keep except for two recent exceptions - Harry Potter and some religious, sexist book that found its way onto my shelf.
8. Keep dust jacket or toss it? Keep it.
9. Read with dusk jacket or remove it? Remove it.
10. Short story or novel? Usually neither, but I do own a few compilations of short stories.
11. Harry Potter or Lemony Snicket? Neither - I would have to choose Snicket over Potter though.
12. Stop reading when tired or at chapter breaks? Stop reading when tired.
13. "It was a dark and stormy night" or "Once upon a time"? How about, "A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away"?!
14. Buy or borrow? My process - browse it at bookstore, then borrow it from library. Buy it afterwards if I enjoyed it. Sometimes this process does not work when books are on a good sale - then I just buy them!
15. Buying choice: book reviews, recommendations, or browsing? Browsing, research, then recommendations.
16. Lewis or Tolkien? Couldn't do Tolkein, have not tired Lewis.
17.Collection (short stories by same author) or anthology (short stories by different authors)? Anthology.
18. Tidy ending or cliffhanger? Tidy Ending. If it was good enough writing you won't need a cliffhanger to get me to buy your next book.
19. Morning, afternoon or nighttime reading? Nighttime.
20. Standalone or series? Standalone.
21. New or used? New, unless I am borrowing it from a friend, or it is in excellent condition. I am OCD about my books.
22. Favorite book of which nobody else has heard? French Cats Don't Get Fat, Henry Beard and Susan Jones.
23. Top five favorite books of all time?This was really hard to come up with - all the books I like are non-fiction! The Giver, Lois Lowry; Lucky, Alice Sebold; Fast Food Nation, Eric Schlosser; Living La Dolce Vita, Raeleen D'Agostino Mautner; A Guide to the World's Greatest Buildings, et al Trevor Howells.
24. Favorite genre series? Uh, do the Dan Brown books count? I rarely read fiction!
25. Currently reading? How to live with a Neurotic Cat, Stephen Baker.

72 DAYS | FEBRUARY 20, 2007

I am having a wonderful semester - I enjoy my classes and I have even managed to make some new friends (something I thought was impossible for me). I am having fun working for EH&S and am even doing some freelance design work on the side.

But. I. Just. Want. To. Graduate.

A lot of people say that college is much better than the real world. And I can see why they would say that - you have less free time, don't get summer vacation, you don't get to sleep in class anymore. I am really excited about working though, and I am not sure why. I think it is because academia has pushed me away from my real interests for awhile, and now that I am working on my portfolio again, I remember how fun architecture is.

And then there is the whole getting married in September thing.

72 days until May 5th graduation!

FOODY | FEBRUARY 19, 2007

Do you ever notice the lingering smell of food on your clothes are you leave a particularly poignant restaurant? This started happening to me in Denmark, and has been happening more and more lately. It even happens in kitchen homes, such as Steven's grandmother's home, where there is always something cooking.

I am calling it a foody smell. For example, today Steven picked me up after my racquetball class and I immediately noticed the smell on his clothes after breakfast at his grandma's. So I told him he smelled foody.

Do other people noticed this too? It kind of drives me nuts because it is usually a fried, buttery smell that sticks to your clothes, and even your hair.

ULTERIOR AGENDA | FEBRUARY 16, 2007

Unbeknownst to Steven, I have an agenda for us this weekend.

I want to discuss our honeymoon! Even though it is the last thing we should discuss on our mile long wedding to-do list, I think it will be fun. Can you pick out which book does not belong?

SIX STRANGE FACTS | FEBRUARY 15, 2007

I have been tagged by Kevin to reveal six strange facts by myself and tag six others. I won't tag anyone, but if you want to respond, please do!

1. I love techno music. I am a closet raver who cannot dance. Imagine the danger of that combination.
2. I have a folder on my computer full of cat pictures I have found on the internet. Now, is that so surprising? (I also have one full of Natalie Portman pictures)
3. I know the names of many fonts. I have preferences about which ones should be used for certain things. And yes, I despise Times New Roman. You will never see it here. Or on anything I produce.
4. I have awful hearing (is this related to #1?). I guess half the time at what people are saying. Pardon makes up 10% of my spoken vocabulary (after wtf, of course). Thankfully, my dad is looking into our health insurance to see if we can get my ears tested, and what we can do about the problem. Maybe it will just be a matter of cleaning them out, and maybe it will be something more. Until then, I will continue to turn on the closed captioning on my DVDs and pretend I know what you are saying to me.
5. I have 58 custom folders in my yahoo mail account. Take a peak and see if you are in there.
6. Most of these "strange facts" are quite dorky. Well, here is the fact to top it off - I have software on my computer to organize and keep track of the books in my personal library. Most of the books are design, travel or self-help. Yup, a big dork.

MEH | FEBRUARY 14, 2007

My leave of absence is officially over - for now. It started off with being too busy with school work, then turned into being too sick to write anything coherent (or even less coherent than what I normally write, I suppose).

Besides being Valentine's Day (and Steven sent me a gorgeous bouquet by the way!), the Ørestad competition entry was also due today - which is basically a mini-celebration in its own. I worked with a group of four other classmates to get it done, and although I am happy with the results, I am VERY HAPPY to be done with it. It was one of those projects where everyone felt rushed and confused most of the time. Basically, we mostly all signed up for the studio to travel to Copenhagen, disregarding the fact that we would only have a week and a half to prepare a design competition entry when we got back.

Now I feel free to work on more important things - my portfolio. I had a little mini freak-out last week. I started counting down the weeks to Spring Break and realized that I didn't have any job interviews yet. In fact, I have only sent out my resume to one firm.

I won't feel like an absolute failure if I do not have my resume and portfolio sent out in time for Spring Break interviews, but I will definitely be disappointed in myself. I know I have time after I graduate to interview, but I don't want to sit on it forever.

I suppose the "stress" about this competition entry has just been transferred to job search "stress." Luckily, I enjoy creating my portfolio and researching firms!

EYEBROW THREADING | FEBRUARY 10, 2007

I heard about eyebrow threading on the radio in December and was immediately curious. Using thread instead of hot wax to remove eyebrow hair quickly? It sounded like a task for a talented and dextrous person.

So I did the whole "let my eyebrows grow out because they look like crap anyway" thing. When I couldn't wait any longer, I made an appointment in Ames to get them threaded.

Basically, the beautician uses a twisted cotton thread and rolls over a row of eyebrow hairs, pulling them directly out from the follicle (I made her show me afterwards, on my arm, because I still think it is amazing). And it felt just like that - like a row of your hairs were being pulled out, rather than one. When Steven asked me if it was painful, I told him it was like the pain of tweezing one eyebrow hair - times 10. I did have to squeeze my hands together and clench my teeth while the beautician was doing it.

The benefit is that it is more precise than waxing and better for your skin. Over Thanksgiving break my freshman year, some crazy lady waxed my eyebrows too thin and pulled off a lot of my skin too (and right before I had to visit my in-laws, thanks a lot!). Ever since then, I have been hesitant to let someone use wax on my face.

I am definitely happy with the results, and made another appointment for March. The woman who did it is from Iran, and told me that eyebrow threading is an ancient technique that was first done in the Middle East.

(And I would put up a picture of myself to show you, but I already feel self-centered enough as it is).

LONG-DISTANCE... | FEBRUARY 9, 2007

One of my friends who is in a long-distance relationship recently said to me "I used to think it must be hard for you to live so far from Steven and now I can understand why you do it."

A lot of people say that long-distance relationships don't work. I think those are the people who give up in the beginning when it is hard, and you do feel sad and lonely. I think that is how my friend feels now.

When I came back for my sophomore year of school, it felt weird to be on campus, taking classes without Steven around like he was before. But I eventually got used to it. I don't prefer to go a long time without seeing him (or anyone I am close to really), but it does not bother me much. And I definitely look forward to moving in with him permanently this summer.

I think that a lot of people define themselves by the relationships they are in - daughter, mother, friend, significant other - I am just worried that too many people define themselves by their romantic relationships. A lot of people I know are either happy or sad depending on whether or not they are in a relationship, or depending on how the relationship is going.

So I think it is easier to be in a long-distance relationship if you are not someone who is only happy if you are in a relationship. This doesn't make sense when I write it in here, but it makes sense in my head.

PROFESSIONALISM | FEBRUARY 8, 2007

Obviously, one would want to be serious and professional at work (or at least come off as being serious and professional). But why does some people's serious and professional come off as dry and bothered?

A few incidences have made me think of this. First - I saw one of my coworkers at HyVee a few weeks ago fondling and goofing around with who I will assume is his wife/girlfriend/lover. I didn't even recognize him because he always acts so cocky and serious at work. Second - the other day I was working with someone, and another person came to talk to them and they wouldn't even acknowledge their presence. Third - some of my classmates seemed pissed off and serious the whole time we were in Copenhagen.

I know you have to be professional and get work done, but why can't people at least smile and at least try to appear happy at the same time? You know, research says if you force a smile onto your face, it will make you feel a little better.

DANISH TRANSLATION? | FEBRUARY 6, 2007

It's not a derogatory term in Danish or Swedish... but the above phrases will be used that way in my vocabulary!

MY LIFE'S A BLUR | FEBRUARY 5, 2007

My days are a blur of distractions and deadlines. I am consciously and unconsciously multi-tasking. When I do have the luxury to put all of my thoughts and efforts towards one goal, I am amazed at the ease of which things are accomplished.

I feel like I am forever running around trying to get things done in the most efficient manner. My schedule is booked back to back and I am looking for a window of free time.

But who doesn't feel like this? At least I can still afford the luxury of happiness.

ROADBLOCKS TO COMMUNICATION | FEBRUARY 4, 2007

This list came from my Sex and Gender in Society class packet. I am not sure how it applies to what we are learning in class, but I found it interesting - because I recognize some of these "roadblocks" in me, and some of them in people I know. I will bold the ones I think/know that I do - even though I try not to. Which ones do you do, if any?

1. Ordering, directing, demanding - "You stop making so much noise!"
2. Warning, threatening - "I'll really be irritated if you do that"
3. Moralizing, preaching - "Don't ever interrupt a person when she's talking"
4. Advising, giving solutions - "Why don't you talk to your boss about it?"
5. Lecturing, teaching, giving facts - "People get their work done by setting goals"
6. Judging, criticizing, blaming - "You're being very careless about this report"
7. Praising, buttering up - "You're usually so thoughtful with your friends"
8. Name-calling, ridiculing - "Can't seem to tell time, can you?"
9. Interpreting, analyzing - "If you won't try to please everybody, you'll feel better"
10. Reassuring, sympathizing - "It can happen to the best of us"
11. Probing, questioning - "Why did you let her do that to you?"
12. Withdrawing, diverting, humoring - "You're so cute when you're angry!"

PRETTY PRETTY PRINCESS | FEBRUARY 3, 2007

I am so happy to be using my normal hair straightener again. My european one just doesn't cut it. You can probably tell from the photos I posted here that I was having BAD hair days. It totally drives me nuts when my hair is all frizzy and sticking out in different directions. That is why I wore a gray stocking cap all week - to hide my hair.

Here is a photo of the tiara I bought yesterday in Copenhagen (this only relates to the above statement because it is something that I will wear in my hair, on my wedding day). I showed Steven a picture of the tiara and he liked it, so I am excited about that. Now I kind of want to wear it everyday but I know it won't be special anymore if I do that.

Did I mention I bought a book called Photoshop Cosmetic Surgery with some of my Christmas money? Check out this vain alteration.

GOODBYE COPENHAGEN | FEBRUARY 2, 2007

We got up early today to swim in the elliptical pool and warm baths (the trampoline was closed!) then walked around and shopped until our flight left. I bought a tiara to wear on my wedding that is made by a Danish designer. Yeah, that is probably the most eventful part of the day. The long flight sure wasn't. Blah.

Even though I didn't want to come home, it feels good to be back. I think most people feel this way when they travel - sad to leave, but happy to go home to their own warm bed.

It was so nice to take a whole week in the beginning of the semester off - especially in another country. I was worry free and happy. I had a good time and did not think about school work. I did research for our studio project while I was there, but it was much more laid back than being Ames. Now it is back to work! I have to write papers, study for tests, prepare the competition entry... blah blah blah. All the work I have to do now just makes me more grateful for my little holiday.

COPENHAGEN AND MALMÖ DAY 7 | FEBRUARY 1, 2007

Clare and I were interviewed by the politi (cops) last night. We heard some glass crash very loudly after 2:00 am (because we had our window open) and when we went to see what it was, we saw someone trying to break into the hotel. I immediately picked up the phone, but it did not work, so we ran down to the reception area (sans shoes and bras) to tell them what happened. Then we waited around so the cops could ask us questions (a reception guy gave us each a Carlsberg beer while we waited - we thought that was funny!).

The guy at reception told us that if we hadn't gotten up and been talking (loudly) near our open window, more would have been stolen. So now I know it is good for me to be loud.

We didn't get to bed until 3:00 am. So we were both very tired and unwilling to get up today, (okay, not really anymore than I normally do not want to get up) but we still made it to Sweden!

Some people thought it might be lame to go to Malmö just to say "Oh, I've been to Sweden," but we ended up having a lot of fun. You get on a train at the main Copenhagen station, and it travels east towards the Øresund. Then the train goes under the water until it emerges on the Øresund bridge. On the bridge, the train travels one level lower than the cars. The rest of the trip is above grade, and it only takes about 25 minutes total for the whole trip. A lot of people commute to Copenhagen for work, so the bridge runs regularly. It just blows my mind that you can travel so easily this way!

We walked through some of the public squares and parks in Malmö, and found some cool shops. The exchange rate is better there, so things are actually cheaper than Denmark. Noticeably cheaper! You would expect Malmö to feel exactly the same as Copenhagen, but I felt like it was different - a bit dirtier, with less bicycles and more beggars (but still wonderful to visit, just in comparison). There was no lane for bicycles to drive in, like there is in Copenhagen. Obviously, the topography (flat) and climate was the same because we were only 50 km away.

Here is the weird thing about Sweden - they only drive Saabs there! Just kidding! I had to say that to see if Steven is reading.

Since I was going to Sweden, I told my travel buddies (Clare and Nate) that I was going to buy anything that resembled a fish candy, so I could bring back some swedish fish for my mother - you know, the ones they sell in the States? Whatever I found, and whatever it tasted like, I was going to tell my mother they were swedish fish from Sweden, because I knew she would like that. Well, not only did I find the real thing, but they taste frickin' awesome! I talked to the salesperson, and he told me they are the most popular candy in Sweden! I did not know they were really an import from Sweden - I thought they were just a candy we called Swedish for some reason! I hope they are still fresh when my mother gets them (Dad - please relay this message - who knows if she reads here or checks her email).

The other really exciting thing about Malmö (besides the lower exchange rate and AWESOME swedish fish) were these cool cat sculptures we saw by a canal. There were steps down to the water of the canal, and 5 different sculpted cats on different parts of the steps. They were too cute (click on the images below to make bigger)!

      

And some random Malmö pictures...

   

I don't want to leave Copenhagen! Insert sad face here.

© COPYRIGHT 2005-2007 Kim Ilax. All Rights Reserved.