Comments (16)

By kilax, January 10, 2010 7:43 am

Ugh, this is way too long. Trying to work on that! If you decide to skim, make sure you check out my wipe-out story in the January 9 section (and I always appreciate your feedback on my questions in bold!).

Day 78 | January 4, 2010: strength

I had nightmares on Sunday about how busy the gym would be Monday (due to New Years Resolution-ers). How sad is that? It was unusually crowded. There were a lot of new faces, and a lot of randomness (meandering from machine to machine) but I only had to adjust my routine a bit.

I ended up using the new machines on Monday, and had to up the weight a bit on them (the weight was in different increments than the old machines). Yep. I had shaky arms afterward. Loved it!

Ha ha. I heard a funny conversation in the locker room while I was changing to go work out. One woman was getting ready to leave and another woman came in and recognized her. “Oh!” said the women who was walking in, “You’re starting the new year off right!”

“Actually,” the other woman said, “I have been doing this since October!” (Then she talked about one of the trainers and how great the program is that she set up for her and how it “saved her life.” Yeah. She said that.)

I bet that woman who had just finished her workout was feeling pretty good about herself, being able to say she had been working out since October. The other woman did say this was her “first workout.” Hope she can stick with it!

Biangular Lat Row: 15 @ 30 lb, 15 @ 50 lb, 15 @ 50 lb
Lateral Raise: 15 @ 25 lb, 15 @ 37.5 lb, 15 @ 37.5 lb
Biangular Chest Press: 15 @ 30 lb, 15 @ 50 lb, 15 @ 50 lb
Shoulder Press: 15 @ 20 lb, 15 @ 20 lb, 15 @ 20 lb
Lat Pulldowns: 15 @ 45 lb, 15 @ 60 lb, 15 @ 60 lb
Pectoral Fly: 15 @ 45 lb, 15 @ 60 lb, 15 @ 60 lb
Arm Curl: 15 @ 25 lb, 15 @ 25 lb, 15 @ 25 lb
Seated Leg Press: 15 @ 70 lb, 15 @ 70 lb, 15 @ 90 lb
Leg Extension: 15 @ 30 lb, 15 @ 45 lb, 15 @ 45 lb
Leg Curl: 15 @ 30 lb, 15 @ 40 lb, 15 @ 20 lb
Hip Abduction: 3 x 15 @ 115 lb
Hip Adduction: 3 x 15 @ 55 lb
Woodchop: 15 each side at 30 lb
V Bar Pushdowns: 3 x15 @ 30 lb

Day 79 | January 5, 2010: 6 m run + cross

I don’t know what it is about running on the office treadmill in the morning, but it has been going really well for me. I think I am a morning runner.

I headed back down to the gym at lunch time for some biking. A coworker saw me taking my jewelry off (to lock at my desk) and said, “Are you going to the gym? Weren’t you there this morning?!” (Why yes, I was, remember, you said to me “Your motivation sickens me, Kim!”). Ha. She was only teasing me, but hey, I told her, I have nothing better to do at lunch time…

The only problem is that I am starting to get really hungry. And it’s hard not to eat everything in sight!

Distance: 6.0 | Time: 59:34 | 1: 10:21 | 2: 10:11 | 3: 10:00 | 4: 9:50 | 5: 9:41 | 6: 9:31
Bike Time: 45:00 | Distance: 8.22 (Set on “Ozark Trails”)

Day 80 | January 6, 2010: strength

What is your opinion on strength workouts – should you target areas, like “upper body” or “lower body” per day, or do entire body strength workouts?

I fit in what I can – strength 2-3 times a week, so I focus on whole body (like below). But I overheard this guy telling another guy in the gym about how disappointed he was when his son came home for Christmas and he found out that the son’s college track coach had them doing entire body workouts in the weight room. I was surprised he was so upset (I’m so nosy, I know!).

Biangular Lat Row: 15 @ 30 lb, 15 @ 50 lb, 15 @ 50 lb
Lateral Raise: 15 @ 25 lb, 15 @ 37.5 lb, 15 @ 37.5 lb
Biangular Chest Press: 15 @ 30 lb, 15 @ 50 lb, 15 @ 50 lb
Shoulder Press: 15 @ 20 lb, 15 @ 20 lb, 15 @ 20 lb
Lat Pulldowns: 15 @ 45 lb, 15 @ 60 lb, 15 @ 60 lb
Pectoral Fly: 15 @ 45 lb, 15 @ 60 lb, 15 @ 60 lb
Arm Curl: 15 @ 25 lb, 15 @ 25 lb, 15 @ 25 lb
Seated Leg Press: 15 @ 70 lb, 15 @ 70 lb, 15 @ 90 lb
Leg Extension: 15 @ 30 lb, 15 @ 45 lb, 15 @ 45 lb
Leg Curl: 15 @ 30 lb, 15 @ 40 lb, 15 @ 20 lb

Day 81 | January 7, 2010: 6 m run

I had another great 6-miler on the office treadmill (well, great until the last 7 minutes when I had to poo like no other). I get there early, turn on NBC and read the captions while I run and listen to music. Ha, it would be so cool if there was a station I could turn out to read blogs! Would you tune in? The only problem would be leaving comments.

Distance: 6.0 | Time: 59:34 | 1: 10:21 | 2: 10:11 | 3: 10:00 | 4: 9:50 | 5: 9:41 | 6: 9:31

Day 82 | January 8, 2010: cross

This post is getting WAY too long, so I am not going to say much about this uneventful hour bike ride (okay, except that I read a copy of Health and liked it – I might get a subscription).

Comments (14)

By kilax, April 22, 2009 5:48 am

Even though I’ve been losing weight, I’ve still been struggling with some food issues. I forced myself to think about it and try to get to the root of the problem. And I think I actually began to figure a few things out.

I am afraid of hunger. I am afraid of being caught unprepared. I am afraid of the unplanned.

What does this mean? I worry about becoming hungry, I am scared I will be unprepared and have to eat something unplanned. I am afraid of the unknown. I hate being out of control.

So here’s what happens. I always have a ton of healthy snacks with me. I stick to my grazing plan and eat something almost every 2-3 hours, sometimes more frequently, especially at work. I never let myself feel hunger. I worry about fueling before a workout, so I always make sure I have something in my stomach. I try to prevent hunger.

It’s not a super big issue. The snacks are usually healthy, I never feel full to the point that my stomach hurts, and I’ve only had a few out of control moments (more the last few days).

But still – what’s the deal? Why am I not listening to my real hunger signals? I think I’ve lost touch with hunger, and it’s time to try to find it again.

Glamour photo gone wrong?

I think that this photo of Data requires a caption and submittal to icanhascheezburger… I just can’t come up with anything clever? Can you? (diane, I’m looking your way!)

Comments (18)

By kilax, April 15, 2009 5:01 pm

I don’t know what is wrong with wordpress, but the first two times I tried to post this, the comments didn’t work. Here we go again…

My office’s Biggest Loser Challenge ended today. It began on January 21st and 22 people participated. There was a $12 entry fee, and $2 fee per missed weigh-in and per each pound gained. In the end, the money pot was $428! Do the math on that one!

First place received 55%, second received 25% and third received 20%.

I came in second place with a total loss of 14.17% and won $107. First place was 14.54% and third place was 13.99% (very close!). I stayed in second place almost every week of the competition, except for a week in third, and a week in first (after I was sick).

Now it’s time to stuff my face again!

Just kidding.*

Participating in this was interesting. It brought on a lot of comments and questions about my weight and appearance, which is not something I am used to. I felt uncomfortable at times, just because I was unprepared to react to that kind of attention. I wonder if that will all stop now, that it is over?

Overall, I think the Challenge was helpful with keeping me on track with my healthy eating. I didn’t feel restricted by it**; it was kind of like a friendly reminder. And I’ve mentioned a few times how this made my relationship with the scale so much better – it taught me that the periodical ups and downs don’t mean that much – you have to look at the big picture!

*Although, I did save myself a homemade cookie to eat on my lunch break, and I was kind of “meh” about eating it. I thought it would be orgasmic or something, after not having sweets since 2/25. Guess not!
**Although a few times, I did ask Steven if we could not eat out.

Comments (24)

By kilax, March 25, 2009 5:24 am

For the first time in my life, I find myself without an appetite. Food seems to be of no interest to me. The only reason I am eating is to fuel my body.

Eating has been becoming more and more about “fueling my body” for some time now. But I was still looking forward to eating. Since Friday, coinciding with becoming sick, food seems to have become a big nuisance. A pain in the butt. A chore.

Yesterday, I took my entire regular food stash with me to work, plus some extra, hoping I would find my appetite. But all I ended up eating during the day, unwillingly, was instant oatmeal, two bites of a banana, soup and a roll, and a homemade granola bar.

Then I got home and ran 4 miles.

That felt wonderful.

NOT.

So. It’s time to force myself to eat. I know this may be a common phenomenon for people when they are sick, but it’s not for me. I love to eat. I always want to eat. I would get out of bed at 3:00 am if it was for a legitimate, scheduled meal.

I know my appetite will come back when I get better, but right now, I can’t taste anything. The thought of food makes me feel sick.

Blah blah blah. Wah wah wah. I’m sick. Boring post. Boo. Sorry. Something better tomorrow.

Off topic, but making me crazy: Has anyone else’s google reader been re-marking things “unread” after you’ve marked them “read”? Mine has been doing this for a few days and it’s making me crazy. Sometimes it sticks, and sometimes it flashes for awhile then goes away.

Comments (13)

By kilax, February 2, 2009 5:57 pm

Awhile ago, Steven told me he felt like he needed to start eating more. The half marathon training was making him feel hungry all the time (plus he does weights and about 10 million crunches every night).

I was a bit behind Steven in the training, so I was kind of like, “Uh huh, use that as an excuse to eat more. Sure.” I mean, why would running more make you more hungry? That just doesn’t make any sense.

Uh… duh, Kim.

Now I am putting in around 16 miles a week (4 days of running) and a few miscellaneous hours here and there (walking, fencing, wii tennis [ha – can I include that?], etc.) and I am HUNGRY. HUNGRY HUNGRY HUNGRY.

I don’t know why, but I just wasn’t expecting this effect. I thought about how I would have to eat healthy, to fuel my body, but I didn’t think my body would respond by demanding more fuel. I guess it all makes sense though.

It feels really good to eat healthy food all day, then have a long run at night. When I am eating healthy, with fueling my body in mind, it doesn’t feel like work. It doesn’t feel like I am being forced to do it. It just feels good – it feels like the right thing to do. It’s the thing I WANT to do.

Will this half marathon training actually make me have a healthy relationship with food? Is that even possible?

I’ve just noticed that I seem to be less worried about how much I eat, since I am running so much, and actually feel hungry. I feel less guilty, having a treat on a rest day, because I know I will work it off. I feel like I deserve it!

Of course, I must admit that my competitive streak did kick in just a tiny bit on the work Biggest Loser Challenge. More about that tomorrow, but I do realize I need to be careful. I want to lose weight, but I don’t want to be so weak I can’t walk up a flight of stairs – I’ve exercised/eaten so little before that I’ve been in that situation, and it’s awful.

That’s not my intent. When I say I am hungry, it means I am eating more, and enjoying it!

So… we’ll see where all of this goes. I am only 6 weeks into my training. I have 10 weeks of training left – and I will be running quite a bit more during those last 6 or so weeks. Maybe the hunger will go away as my body gets used to running so much. Or maybe I will just have to keep eating more. There’s nothing wrong with that, as long as my body continues to adapt if I end up putting in less miles per week after the half marathon.

Comments (8)

By kilax, November 12, 2008 9:29 pm

During the summer I lived in Rome by myself, I spent a long weekend visiting a classmate who was working in London (July 15-17 in the archives).

I arrived on Friday while he was still at work. The first thing I did when I got into the airport was go into a shop and stock up on snacks. Then when I arrived in the city, I did the same thing. I walked to the British Museum, eating all of my snacks along the way. After leaving the museum, I stopped and sat in a park, and had some more snacks. I later meet up with him to tour his office and have dinner.

I was constantly absorbed with thoughts of when the next time I would get to eat would be. I was not hungry at all, but that was the only thought I could concentrate on. It was like that in Rome too. I was in an office, around coworkers all day, and felt like I could never eat the things I wanted in the office. I waited until my hour long lunch break to run to the stores and stuff my face silly. Sometimes I would go to a regular grocery store, a bakery and a gelateria. All during an hour!

My friend and I spent all day that Saturday exploring London with another friend of his. We went to a few parks, museums, shops. It was a surprisingly beautiful day.

What was even more surprising to me that day, was that I did not spend every moment thinking about food, or when I would get to have something to eat. I was genuinely enjoying the day, and the thoughts of food were gone. I felt hunger again.

That situation was a real eye-opener for me. Even that day, I remember saying “I forgot to eat! I need to get a snack!” I actually felt light headed. Instead of feeling stuffed and uncomfortable like I always did, I actually was experiencing real hunger.

Thinking back on it, I realize that I was eating so much when I was in Rome because I was lonely. At first it wasn’t like that – the first half of my summer there went really well. I was eating well, exploring, and volunteering. But something changed in me. I think I started to feel true loneliness for the first time, but I didn’t know what emotion it was.

It was so dumb, because I couldn’t figure it out when it was happening. I couldn’t figure out why I was eating so much. I think I was just stuffing my face to forget the fact that I didn’t have any close family or friends around.

Anyway, I thought about this a lot yesterday and today. Yesterday I went out to lunch with two people. I had a weird panic during lunch that caused me to scarf down my salad and eat a lot more bread than I normally would have. Then I spent the rest of lunch sitting there anxiously, thinking about what more I could eat when I got back to the office. It was the same feeling I had been having all the time in Rome. I got back to the office and ate and ate and ate. I did NOT stop the binge this time.

Today, I went out to lunch and it was a completely different situation. I felt comfortable, was able to eat slowly, and enjoy the conversation, as well as my food.

What was different between the two days? My emotions. Yesterday I felt on edge, uncomfortable, and nervous with the people I was with. Today I felt at ease, happy and calm.

It’s too bad that yesterday’s lunch made me have this reaction. But it also taught me something about myself – that I have a tendency to overeat when I am feeling uncomfortable, and that it is easy for it to spiral out of control.

Identifying what is making me uncomfortable is the key to tackling it. I know what it is now, so I am able to work against it. I just have to remember to do that in the future – identify my emotions first. Before I start eating.

There’s no point in being upset about it. Today was a new day. A much better day! Yeah, I probably won’t lose any weight this week, but so what? I still ran 2.5 miles tonight and it felt great. I am still the lightest I have been in the last 4 years. One (or two or three) bad days isn’t going to kill me.