Comments (10)

By kilax, October 5, 2008 7:31 am

I never thought the term “retail therapy” applied to me. Even though I have spent a few lunch breaks walking up and down State Street, wandering in and out of stores I had visited only a week or so before… I just thought I was looking for “essentials” for my work wardrobe.

Right.

Now that I have cut back on that (really, I have most of what I need) I realize that shopping was just a replacement for what I used to do during my lunch break to get away from work stress for awhile – eat eat EAT!

Don’t worry – I didn’t waste a lot of money, or even spend that many days at the stores, I just realized when I was out there, I wasn’t really looking for anything in particular. I was just looking for a mental break.

For a few months, I have been eating my lunch at my desk. Every day.

I hate this. It makes me feel anti-social. And it doesn’t really count as a mental break. Even if I am sitting there, reading email or blogs, or whatever.

Somedays, I don’t even leave the floor of my building.

Which must be why I liked going to shops. It just got me out of the building. And may be why I would run around outside looking for treats, before I started my healthy lifestyle quest.

We have a “break room.” But you know what? I can’t eat in there. I can’t sit still, and watch people eat their lunch. Without craving something more than mine. I am not starving myself, but I am grazing – I eat small things throughout the day. It actually feels great. But sitting down, and seeing someone eat so much more, along with trying to make small chat – I can’t do it. It makes me all nervous and antsy and depressed. It affects my ENTIRE day.

And I can’t take my small lunch back there and make it last very long. I already eat fast, and I am not eating much. So put those two together – why even go back there?

When I lived and worked in Rome, I did this as well. Only, we HAD to leave the office during lunch. So I would walk around and see the sights, eating my small lunch. Why can’t I do that here?

Yeah, ideally, I wouldn’t be this weird about food.