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By kilax, December 25, 2009 6:01 am

Happy Holidays Everyone!

My family does a holiday photo each year (you can check them all out here). They usually have a funny theme, but this year, we actually took a serious photo to send out.

Anthony, Me, Steven, Mom, Nicholas, Dad, Thomas (baby) Nick, Courtney (SiL) and Christina

Don’t I have a gorgeous family (if I do say so myself)? I am happy we took these*.

The original Ilax clan

I get to spend today** with my other family – Steven’s parents and brother! They snuck in (from Kansas City) just before the ice storm and I am happy to be celebrating the holiday with them in our home this year! We’re so lucky that they were able to come out and share the day with us. It’s so nice to slow down and relax for once.

However you spend the day, I hope it is wonderful! Leave me a comment telling me your favorite part of the day!

*Even though, uh, it was 25 pounds ago
**I will see my family in January

Comments (17)

By kilax, December 8, 2009 5:32 am

Do you ever get it in your mind that you ABSOLUTELY have to do something, and that is all you can think about, obsessively, until you’ve done it?

This is not necessarily a good thing. It’s compulsive.

com-pul-sion: Psychology. a strong, usually irresistible impulse to perform an act, esp. one that is irrational or contrary to one’s will.

If my photo were next to a definition in the dictionary, I fear it would be that one. I sometimes think compulsion is the cause of many of my actions. A few examples:

• When I found out Foer was speaking in Chicago, it was all I could think about for hours while I figured out the logistics. I was stressed out about it at work, when I should have been focused.
• I missed 1.5 miles of my Thursday run and thought obsessively about fitting it in last Friday, when really, I needed to rest my legs*. I didn’t run the 1.5 miles, thankfully.
• This post. I wrote it on my exercise sheet while I was doing my strength routine last Friday. It was all I could think about. Even when writing it (last night on the airplane) I closed the lid of my computer for take-off, but thought of something to write and had to open it back up.
• I had it in my mind that I was going to make certain dishes for my family when they visited. Apparently my mother had a few dishes in mind too? (Hence the Similarities and Differences post – I think we are both like this.)
• I couldn’t get it out of my mind that I had to get our holiday tree last weekend before “all the good ones were gone.” Luckily, Steven humored me on this one and we picked out our tree on Saturday (free delivery to the house on Sunday!).
• I won’t even go into how this affects my relationship with food!

What is all of this about? Why do I obsessively think and plan things? I sometimes think it is because I am afraid of missing out on events and afraid of forgetting thoughts I have. AND, I just get so excited and pumped about things, I want to get them out there while they are fresh!

But it makes it hard for me to focus. I have all of these thoughts swirling around in my brain. I feel like I have to get certain things done right away. I am agitated if I don’t.

Part of me enjoys the rush that I create for myself. The realistic part of me knows it’s a problem.

I’m hoping someone can relate? It’s one of those things where I feel like “Boo-hoo, I’m the only one” but I can’t be… right?

(Note, while I was finishing writing this, I got another blog idea in my head and had to open a new tab to start typing that out).

*Related, have you read the article titled “Your Better Half” in the January 2010 issue of Runner’s World? Great article. It’s about turning your inner critic into your biggest fan. I paid close attention to the little part about taking a day off when you don’t want to.

Comments (16)

By kilax, November 26, 2009 10:20 am

You know it’s a good day for a 5K when you wake up and find SNOW on your car!

We didn’t let the snow/rain/cold temps (low 30s) deter us! I was super excited to be running our first Thanksgiving Day 5K – especially since the entry to this one was practically free! All you had to do was donate some food. And it looks like they got a lot of donations – I think there were at least 300 runners there.

For being an inexpensive race, I thought it was still well organized. They still had bibs, registration, the trail marked, and people helping along on the trail. There were no pace signs at the mile markers, or water stations, but that was fine with me.

The 5K was held in Lippold Park in Crystal Lake (about a 30 minute drive for us), on a crushed granite path. Crushed granite path + 3 days of rain + a little bit of snow + runners on crowded trails = SUPER SOAKED SHOES. A few times we stepped in puddles that went OVER our shoes and had the fun feeling of water squishing between our toes as we ran. No worries though, we brought extra socks and shoes (My idea of course. Even though I will probably never be a mom, I still think I have the mom instinct)!

Check out how muddy my pants got! I think my shoes are ruined. Wah.

And the close-up!!!

Our goal was to get in under 30 minutes. I wasn’t sure if we would be able to because we were focusing so hard on not stepping into ALL of the puddles, but our final time was about 28:40! We even had negative splits. I never really felt like I was struggling, but doubt I could have gone much faster at the end.

Even though the race was crowded, muddy and cold, it was still a lot of fun. I’m so happy to be getting back into the game, and being able to run with Steven. It might be a silly goal, but I would like to work on my speed, as well as endurance this winter. Do you have any winter running or exercise goals?

Distance: 3.09 | Time: 28:40 | 1: 9:49 | 2: 9:11 | 3: 8:52 | 4: 00:46

Data is happy it is Thanksgiving and is going to celebrate by resting his butt on my head. Happy Thanksgiving everyone!

Comments (14)

By kilax, November 23, 2009 6:57 am

This weekend, while the boys were doing this,

Steven working on the Datsun

this,

Dad working on the Datsun

and this,

Data watching over us

my mom, grandma and I were doing this,

Visiting Millennium Park (and downtown Chicago)

this,

Since Christina couldn’t be there, mom talked to her on the phone while she frosted cookies.

this,

Mom wraps the gifts while Data watches

and this,

Posing for silly photos so we won’t lose our minds

with finished products like this

Sample plate of goodies
(We ended up making vegan sugar cookies, vegan chocolate chip cookies, peanut butter kisses, peanut clusters (some vegan), caramel popcorn (some vegan), butterscotch num nums, vegan chex mix, and (pre-made) toffee)

and this.

Mica’s Prize

And now it’s all over! I’m always sad to see family (or friends) go – it’s a fun change of pace to have more people in the house. But I would be lying if I told you I wasn’t looking forward to resting and sitting on my ass tonight!

It’s funny how spending two whole days with my mom and grandma really made our similarities and differences stand out. And you could say that about spending concentrated chunks of time with anyone – not just family. Take college roommates for example. After just a full day or so together, you realize whether or not you have the same methods of doing things and whether you were raised with the same values. It’s things as simple as how you clean, or how often you clean, and how you communicate about it.

Obviously, I have more specific examples from this weekend, but I don’t think it would be nice to talk about them here. It was just interesting to me to see which family traits (or values and methods) I’ve held on to, and which I have modified. Some of it has to do with food choices, like the on-going (for years) butter vs. margarine debate, and some of it had to do with conflicting personality characteristics – not conflicting because they’re different, but because they’re the same. Maybe I can write about that at a later date.

These last two paragraphs make it sound like I didn’t have a great time, when really, I did. It’s just that I don’t see my family very often, and I rarely get them all to myself, so I just feel like our interactions are more intense, because they’re so rare.

Anyway, have you had an experience with someone else that really made your similarities and differences stand out?

And now it’s time to tackle google reader and email. How long will it take me to read 340 new posts? Ha. I’ll get through them, but don’t be surprised (or offended!) if you see me commenting on posts a few days old. I haven’t logged in to reader since Thursday night, or even spent much time on the computer.

Comments (34)

By kilax, June 9, 2009 5:06 am

Today is my mom’s 50th Birthday! Happy Birthday Mamu!!!

Do you think I look like my mom at all?

My siblings and Steven and I threw my mom a surprise party this Saturday in Cedar Falls, Iowa. When my dad turned 50, we threw him a surprise party as well, so I was sure my mother would be expecting it. I sent her a “fake” birthday gift last week (I am not sure why I am calling it “fake” – it was actually two tangible gifts) to throw her off.

My grandma (her mother) who lives out of town told my mom that she was coming to town to watch her grandkids and wanted to know if my mom wanted to meet her for dinner. My grandma even called my mom during the day and said something like, “The kids are behaving so nicely!” Ha. She wasn’t even in town yet.

We held the party at my uncle’s bar. The bar has a main area, an extended seating area, and a partitioned off room with a bar. We set up the food in the room with the bar, and crammed back there to yell “surprise!” when she arrived. I think we succeeded in surprising her. I wish I had a photo of her reaction. Hopefully someone got one.

I also wish I had a photo of the setup. My sister and Steven and I worked really hard all day at preparing the food and decorations. We had cold cut sandwiches, fresh veggies and dip, a wonderful fresh fruit salad (grapes, cantaloupe, honeydew, pineapple and strawberries), chips, pea salad and rye bread cucumber sandwiches that my grandma insisted on making, cookies (photo below!), two cakes and soda and water. We decorated with balloons and streamers and posters I made (I will update them to the photo page later in the week).

A lot of people came to the party -about 35 adults and 4 kids. We had everyone sign a frame with birthday wishes on it, the same thing we did for my dad’s party.

Our big gift for my mom was a purple 8GB iPod Nano (if that’s what it’s called). We put her favorite video – I’m on a Boat – on it. When I showed her the video, she turned to her friends and said, “Did you know these things have video?!” It was pretty cute. I bet she’ll use about 20% of it’s capability in her lifetime. The night before the party, we set up the iPod and named it “Forever 39,” so when we found a “39 Forever” button at the party shop the next day, we had to buy it for her!

Steven and I also bought my mom a big can of beans. Ha.

The party was a whirlwind. I was honestly a lot more worn out than I would have liked to be. Fitting party planning in with my already hectic schedule really exhausted me. I felt pretty edgy on Sunday because of my lack of sleep. I hope I get to catch up… someday. A full six hours of sleep in one night would be nice!

Of course, it was totally worth it. Even though I was totally exhausted, I still was having fun being goofy. My mom and sister are pretty good at bringing it out of me.

Trying to eat ice cream cupcakes…

It would be my honor, to be your new stepfather.

And I have to share this photo of my parents looking pretty bad ass back in the day. Steven really likes this photo for some reason, and we got them to “re-pose.” Ha. When explaining the photo, my mom said they had attitude, before there was attitude. Riiight…

And how is my mom spending her actual birthday? In class all day! She has a three hour math class (with a test!) in the morning, and a three hour speech class in the evening. Boo! I hope she still gets to do something fun today!

More photos…

Me and Steven.

My younger brother, Anthony, and my mom.

My sister, me, my grandma and my mom.

Comments (14)

By kilax, May 13, 2009 12:53 pm

I’ve casually mentioned here that I am in the process of becoming vegan. I call it a “process” because there is research I need to do (NOT because I plan on making becoming vegan a process by slowly phasing out dairy and eggs). I don’t want to jump into veganism before I fully understand the way the lifestyle affects my health. First, I want to create a balanced diet, learn the many different names of animal products found in processed foods, and fully understand the lifestyle, THEN make the change.

This is something I’ve been thinking about for a long time, but only recently begun researching. I wanted to participate in Chase Daylight’s 30 Day Vegan Challenge in April, but didn’t. At the time, I discussed it with my nutrition commadre (Steven), and he pointed out that it may not be a good idea to alter my diet too much before our 5/2 half marathon. I thought that was a good point, so I’ve been waiting.

Yesterday, I was at lunch with Diane, and she asked me if I had started the vegan diet yet. I thought it was super considerate that she asked me (to which I answered “no,” even though I had a vegan lunch) and it made me think that maybe people would have questions about me becoming vegan, or veganism in general. I want to use this post to invite all of you to ask me any (serious) questions you have. I will write a post and answer them all when I am ready to make the switch. I will also give an explanation then of what the lifestyle is, and why I am following it. There is a lot I want to say now, but I will wait until then.

Funny note – after I got done writing this, my mom called me and asked if I had started the vegan lifestyle yet. She said, “Make sure you get all your protein!” I told her about this post and that if she wanted, she could be the FIRST person to leave that question. I bet it will take her awhile to get here though.

Comments (15)

By kilax, May 10, 2009 8:20 am

This Mother’s Day, while thinking about my mother, I am especially focusing on one of the defining characteristics of a mother – she is someone who always puts others (her family) first.

Does this define your mom? It defines my mom to a T. Even though we are all grown now, she is still running around, helping everyone out, before she does what she wants to do. She thinks about everyone else’s well-being before her own. It’s amazing that our mothers (and fathers!) are so selfless. I’ll have to call my mother today and thank her for that.

Seeing her act this way has taught me to be considerate of other people’s thoughts, feelings and agenda. People need to feel special, and they feel special when you give them attention and show interest in their interests. Our parents are probably the people who are most able to make us feel special, because we almost always feel like they are focused on us (except for when the grandchildren are around). I mean, who else will drive 250 miles to watch you run your first half marathon, take home your broken down car and look the other way when you eat enough food all weekend for everyone who ran the race?

Bye bye Kimbot II!!!

I am lucky to have such great parents!

Okay, I lied, there are actual TWO things I am focusing on this Mother’s Day. The other thing is what a goober my mother is, how much she likes to have fun, and how she makes me feel like it is okay to be silly and enjoy life! Life is much more fun if you are able to laugh at something each day (hence the tagline – the most wasted of all days is one without laughter).

My mom and I do this hilarious (we think) thing when we sign our emails to one another. I am not sure who started it. Probably her (see –  I learned to be goofy from her!). It started off with simple closings like “hugs and kisses, mom” but then that turned into (see some examples below):

Continue reading 'It’s all about the closing / Happy Mother’s Day!'»

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By kilax, March 17, 2009 6:54 am

Do you ever have a strong urge to call a friend and let all of your emotions and frustrations out, but you hold back, because you don’t want to burden/bother them?

What is with the filter?

I had a day yesterday, that, let’s just say, didn’t make my sour weekend mood go away. Let’s just say it built on it. There’s a lot going at work. It’s nothing bad that reflects on me individually, but something that affects my organization. It was enough to stress me out after I left work and make me have dreams about it last night.

I needed to call someone last night and talk about it. I used to always call my mom first. She has always been my #1 go-to person, and probably always will be. She’s a great listener, and always gives me the reaction I need.

But she’s not always available. She has important daily commitments. And I don’t want to bother her when she’s busy. And quite honestly, I am selfish, and I don’t feel like I get the attention I need when she’s busy (makes sense – she’s busy).

So last night, I had the urge to call a friend first. Someone who is also a good listener. Someone who can relate.

But, I didn’t. I didn’t want to burden her with my work stress, when she already has her work stress.

Thinking about it now, that’s bull-crap. Our relationship is not set up on the premise that we both have perfectly wonderful lives with no stress. Yeah, we’re both generally happy and know we have a lot to be grateful for, but what’s to say I can’t call her and just let her know how stressed I am at the moment?

I believe it’s fine to say I am stressed out about my job right now, without having to justify it with “I am grateful to have a job.” OF COURSE I am. But for the moment, I let that hold me back.

I believe my friend and I are both the nurturing type. We have the tendency to listen a lot to other people’s problems first, before we share ours. It’s not that we don’t share them, just that we don’t prioritize them all the time. We maybe sit on them. I sometimes do, anyway.

This isn’t the first time this has happened. I’ve had strong urges to reach out and call her other times. Once, when I was having some food related issues. I just needed to talk to someone who understood. But still, I held back.

If I am lucky enough to have this wonderful, understanding friend that I can relate to, and who is also a great listener, why don’t I let myself be 100% MYSELF to her?