Comments (18)

By kilax, July 7, 2008 6:02 am

What are you supposed to say to a friend when they tell you they are in so much physical pain they understood why some people end their lives?

My friend Rixa (a 71-year old German woman who lives in Italy) called me this weekend. I met her when I lived in Rome, and I still write to her twice a month, and she calls me every 3 or 4 months.

During this call, she told me about a slew of bad things that happened to her last year that I didn’t even know about. She got hit by a car. Burglars broke into her home while she was there. Then she was in so much pain all the time, and couldn’t walk well or go to the bathroom, that she thought about ending her life, but wondered who would take care of her cats (please, no crazy cat lady jokes).

She had an operation near the end of June that she just now came home from, and has to rest for three weeks. She said she already feels better, which she can’t believe – she was in so much pain she thought it would never end.

She’s a very serious woman. It actually took me awhile to find out what made her smile (and laugh!) but after that, we became very close. It makes me feel awful to know she was in so much pain, and I didn’t even know about it. But what could I have done? She is not the type to want help from anyone else.

She was happy to be receiving my letters at least.