Usually, when I am making a “life decision,” I just follow my gut. I stick to whatever my natural inclination is.
That’s a luxury, I know – a selfish one – to be able to make decisions solely for myself.
(And unfortunately, it’s not always THAT easy. I’ve learned that the big life-changing decisions take me a LONG time to sort out)
In my gut, I knew that I really wanted to participate in the WonderGirl 5K this Saturday. Like I mentioned before, I read about the organization in a magazine, and felt like it really called out to me.
But there were a few logistical barriers: the race is about a zillion and one miles away from my home (okay, 60 miles), I would have to wake up at the crack of dawn to run it (okay, Data is waking me up that early every weekend anyway), and I would have to run it alone (okay, I’ve done that before – no biggie!).
And the big one – I felt guilty asking Steven to get out of bed that early on a Saturday, to drive me halfway across the state (slight exaggeration) and watch me run a 5K – possibly in the snow – with a bunch of young girls and families.
But you know what? I really wanted to do it, so I signed up for it first thing Monday morning, and have been excited about it ever since then.
It struck me as odd this week, that I felt so much excitement simply by signing up for this race. I usually don’t feel this excited about a race.
Yesterday, I found out there is a chapter of Girls on the Run in the county next to mine. From the content on their website, it sounds like they are just getting started.
I found myself getting excited again, imagining myself becoming a running buddy for a young girl in the program, or helping the program set up their first 5K. I was fantasizing about volunteering.
This feeling of excitement helped me get through the day.
But for some reason, I am kind of embarrassed about it.
I am kind of embarassed about being hopeful!
What a weird reaction. I am attributing it to my natural skepticism. Inside me, a voice says, “Yeah, it sounds like a really cool program. But maybe on Saturday you’ll find out it’s totally lame and a big waste of time!”
I can’t go to the race feeling that way, so I am going to continue to be excited, positive and upbeat about it. I am going to continue to look forward to it, and hope that I’ve found a good organization I may like to give some of my time to. I’ll let you know how it goes!