Comments (18)

By kilax, June 2, 2009 6:37 am

For some reason, I was really excited that June 1st started on a Monday. I felt like it was giving me a “fresh start” – a new month and on a MONDAY! I was going to get enough sleep, eat healthy, exercise, get everything done in the evening, and go to bed at 9:30.

Ha. Ha ha. My day quickly turned to crap around lunch time, and didn’t get much better. I suppose the gloom and rain in Chicago didn’t help either.

What’s so silly is that I know that ANY moment can be the moment to make a “fresh start” or change something. A phone call that bothers me in the morning shouldn’t ruin my day. I shouldn’t just throw my healthy diet out the window if I eat too much at lunch time. I’ve got to get rid of this “all or nothing” mindset!

I’ve been saying that forever…

And I’ve been thinking about this forever, which is just fueling the fire. I am sick of trying to “fix me.” I am sick of thinking about being healthy. I am sick of trying to figure out what makes me so anxious and impatient. I just want it all to go away. I just want it all to work ITSELF out.

I don’t want to think about it anymore.

So I’m going to pay someone else to think about it. I’ll see how that goes. I’ve had both bad and good experiences with therapy. Maybe it will be different now that I am an adult paying for it with actual health insurance (versus being in college).

Side Note: It totally cracks me up how many comments I got on yesterday’s “Attacked by birds” post! Thanks for all of your fun comments!