Comments (13)

By kilax, October 19, 2009 12:52 pm

More and more, it’s become aware to me how many people (myself included) will treat the same situation differently, depending on who is involved. I know, I know, it’s obvious. I guess what I should say is, it has become more aware as to how UNFAIR it is. Why give one person leeway when you won’t to another?

I’ll give you an example (I wish I could give you my really good ones, but it wouldn’t be appropriate). In college, one of my close friends NEVER answered my calls or texts. NEVER! I had to wait for her to call me. If anyone else did that to me (now, then, ever) it would piss me off to no end, and I would just quit trying to communicate with them. But with her, for some reason, I didn’t really care.*

I still notice myself doing this now. If person A does X, I get more upset than if person B does X. And in the future, I may act differently around person A entirely.

I think I do this because I subconsciously evaluate who I think people are in my head, then expect them to act a certain way. Here’s another example – my mother is often late… so I’ve come to expect that as part of her character. Now, if anyone else is late? Boy, I am not happy.

It’s not fair to expect people to act a certain way or do a certain thing, especially if you don’t have the opportunity to talk to them about it. Everyone gets to live life their own way, and dealing with different types of people is part of the fun (right… right?).

Of course, there’s more to it than all this. Sometimes it’s better to expect more of someone (like in a work situation) so they improve. Sometimes the reason you treat someone differently is because there is a history between you or some sort of communication breakdown.

But sometimes, it’s just because you’re being unreasonable.

Do you do this? Has it happened to you? It has certainly happened to me – that is what inspired me to write this. I kind of had an “Aha!” moment today. But I can’t be too upset about it, because I do it myself!

(And just so you know, I’m talking about people I’ve had multiple encounters with here, not people I’ve just met.)

P.S. Does this make ANY sense?

*Actually, there were a lot of things about her that bothered me, but we had the most fun together. I think it is because when something bothered me about her, I just told her (Like her gum smacking, hated it. I made her spit out her gum when she was in my house if she couldn’t close her mouth. Bitchy much?), and she did the same for me.

Comments (17)

By kilax, October 15, 2009 5:31 am

I don’t need total privacy when I am using a public restroom – I don’t care if someone is in the stall next to me. However, if I am walking to the restroom, say, at work, and I realize I am going to go into the restroom at the same time as someone else, I will likely let them go in then wait a bit before I do (unless I really have to drop it). I know, it’s weird.

But here’s what weirds me out even more. Let’s say hypothetically (winky face) that you encounter a coworker in the hallway right in front of the bathroom. You are obviously both going in. They start to talk to you about a project. You try to stay in the hallway, but they walk in… so you try to linger a bit in the powder room. But they are going to the stall. They want to have a stall-to-stall conversation.

This just does not fly with me. I don’t know why! I love being crude and telling poop jokes and I am totally down with bodily functions*, but talking about work while on the pot? Not cool!

What do you think (see poll below)? Have you had any encounters like this that made you uncomfortable, or are you fine with it? Am I just being weird about this? I would be especially interested to hear if males ever do this! Ha!

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*I had a friend in college who always left the door open and  it never phased me, and I always barged in on my mom using the bathroom when I was very young… uh, is that normal? (the second thing, not the first)

Comments (32)

By kilax, October 9, 2009 5:50 am

Are you friends with your coworkers on Facebook? Have you found this to be beneficial (fun) or detrimental (annoying)?

Yesterday I mentioned that I was talking to a coworker about Facebook, and told her I don’t have any drunk pictures of myself on there. Well, on Wednesday she asked me if we were friends on Facebook. I told her no, that I am not friends with any coworkers on Facebook. She then added me to a list she was making (I assume of people to friend on Facebook?). I told her if she sent me a friend request I would decline it, because I am trying to keep my work and private life SOMEWHAT separate. Of course, she then had a thousand questions… and had to mention how she knew the reason I didn’t want to be her friend wasn’t because of drunk pictures, because I DON’T DRINK (ever, according to her).

Anyway, this got me thinking, am I being bitchy by telling her I would decline her request (and is that why she seemed so put off about the alcohol discussion Wednesday)? Is it selfish of me to want to keep Facebook more private and personal?

I really am not hiding anything on Facebook, except those awful bathing suit photos my sister posted of me. I don’t have any sort of secret life on there. I think… I have just exposed myself so much on my blog (which I keep from my coworkers, and link to on Facebook), that I want one place to keep for myself. I don’t want to have to censor the things I say on Facebook because I think coworkers might be reading.

It irks me when people want to be Facebook friends, but don’t even communicate with you. Sometimes, it feels like a popularity contest to me. I usually just get on to use the chat to talk to my sister. I sometimes think about deleting my account.

Anyway, I am thinking about creating a separate “work” Facebook account. Kind of. I’m kind of also thinking that I don’t really care.

As a side note, my sister created a Facebook account for my mom last week! I wish she would use it. We have been bugging her to get on Facebook for awhile.

Comments (14)

By kilax, July 30, 2009 7:05 am

…well, be careful what you say ANYWHERE, really, but I’ll get back to that.

This morning, I was riding the elevator with a man and a woman that I don’t know, when one started talking to the other about a building project that my team worked on. The woman asked the man, “Did your team work on that project?”

“Oh, no, no, no,” he defended himself. “I wasn’t involved, but it is my understanding that A LOT of effort went into the decision making.”

“Well, it sure doesn’t look like it!” she responded. The she went on a bit about her ideas for the design.

I had one of those internal dialogues like “should I say something?” The thing is, the project had SO MANY people involved that my team really struggled with it. We were trying to please many different people (all with different opinions!) at once. BUT, all of that doesn’t matter; I still think we did a good job.

So when the guy got off the elevator (after she ranted a bit more), I said, “MY team worked on that project…” kind of inviting her feedback, not that it mattered. The decision was made.

“Oh! Sorry! I just think…” blah blah blah. She went on again about how she liked things the way they were. I just kind of laughed to myself.

You have to be careful what you’re saying. You never know who you’re around!

Earlier this week, I was walking back from a job-site meeting with two coworkers, and I asked who would be managing the project after us. When one of them responded with the person’s name, I said, “Oh, great! It seems like he has a really good understanding of the project.”

Well, after I said that, they went on a bit about one of his coworkers they don’t like as much. And… guess who walked up behind us right after that? The guy who would be managing the project after us. Nice.

I think these conversations are best behind closed doors, and even then, I wonder…

Comments (23)

By kilax, May 21, 2009 11:46 pm

HOLY. FREAKING. COW. THAT. WAS. HARD.

I’ve never run such a congested race in my life. The announcer said there were close to 18,000 people. The event coordinators tried very hard to be organized. They had pace signs at the start, and kept repeating over and over NOT to start in the front if you were walking or planning on finishing in over 30 minutes.

Do people listen? NO! Because everyone is SO special that the rules do not apply to them (this is not a new thought in my head – I recognize this pattern in a lot of people). I got very frustrated when a lot of my coworkers started at the 7:00 minute mile pace, after they had all told me they planned on finishing in over 30 minutes. I passed them. Anyway…

The race was so congested that I did not cross the start line until well over a minute, and I was shoulder to shoulder with people the entire 3.5 miles. I actually saw one guy get knocked over onto the pavement because he was pushed from behind. People started in front of me who were walking, or running much much slower than the people around them. It was frustrating to have to dodge around these people. Oh well. I guess that is to be expected at a big race like this.

This is a race where I kept thinking, “And… why do I run again?” Because it was hard course (it was extremely muggy when we had to run under bridges), it was HOT (75°), and it was so freaking congested. It was just a HARD run. BUT, I gave it my all and finished 3.5 miles in 27:13. My clock time was 28:22 because I didn’t cross the start line right away.

Steven came downtown to watch me race and hang out with me and my coworkers at the after party (I totally sucked at introducing him to people – what is my problem?). I am so happy he came to support me! He said he enjoyed watching people race.

Video of the start!

I started where I was supposed to… this is well before the HUGE crowds! (Click on the photo to enlarge and check out my awesome farmer’s tan! Lame)

The start line.

Starting off… still smiling…

Scary finish photo!

Me and Steven-o.

I was super pumped for this all day, and am happy with my time, but it was not as fun (the racing part) as I expected. I am worn out, and happy I have tomorrow off to kind of relax. And maybe go on an easy run (I can’t help it!).

Comments (24)

By kilax, May 20, 2009 7:23 am

Maybe this is why people think I eat so healthy:

This is the fruit I brought to eat at work today – a peach, a gold delicious apple, a gala apple, an orange, a pink cripps apple, grapes and a banana*.

This is a completely normal amount of fruit to eat, right? Ha ha. How much fruit do you eat in a day?

As I am reseaching more and more about veganism, I am realizing I need to be very careful about my protein intake, especially since I exercise. I am sad to say, I think I am going to have to cut out some of the fruit and replace it with legumes and seeds; I need to “re-balance” my diet. Oh well. I’ll get used to it. (I hope!)

*That banana is not brown enough! But at least it did not explode like the one did from yesterday.

Comments (20)

By kilax, May 19, 2009 6:47 am

I get a lot of comments at work like, “your lunch is so healthy,” “your snacks are so healthy,” “you always eat so healthy,” “do you count carbs or calories?”* “what do I need to eat to lose weight?” “when is your next run?” “what do I need to do to start running?”**

I think that people think I am some sort of… health freak? They see me walking around with an apple, or eating my homemade granola bar, or getting fresh veggies out of the fridge for lunch, and think I am super focused on eating healthy ALL THE TIME.

Ha. Ha ha. I WISH! While it is my goal to get closer and closer to eating a healthy, fresh diet most of the time, I am totally not there yet.

I have two secrets to share:

1. I want to run the Chase Corporate Challenge 3.5 miler in 28 minutes.
2. I’ve gained 4 pounds in the last 4 weeks.

The second secret pretty much cancels out the first one.*** Because, I can feel the small amount of extra weight and it is slowing me down a bit during my runs. I can feel it shaking in my butt.

AND, it’s NO BIG DEAL! I was stressed out, I was eating emotionally, blah blah blah, what did I expect to happen? Mathematically, I knew my calories in was higher than my calories out, even when running 20+ miles a week. I just chose to ignore it for awhile. Because I am human, and I cannot eat perfectly all the time, no matter how hard I try. And I don’t even WANT to eat perfectly all the time. How boring would that be?

Anyway, it makes me laugh at work when I get SO MANY comments on what I am eating and how healthy it is, because I do not “eat healthy” all of the time and I don’t think of the food I eat during the day as “healthy,” I think of it as the food I want to eat – fruit, veggies, whole wheat crackers, granola bars, cereal, veggie dogs, etc.

The good thing is, when people keep saying that to me, it encourages me. It keeps me going. It reminds me that I do need to be making conscious, healthy choices most of the time. And not just “for show” (which it’s not), but because I want to.

So even though the comments do get annoying from time to time (I mean, come on, can I just prepare my lunch in peace?!), I am going to channel it into good – encouragement.

And I am going to quit all of that mindless gosh darn**** snacking.

*Give me a freakin’ break. I am NOT afraid of carbs.
**My punctuation kind of went to crap in this paragraph.
***So I think I will try to finish in under 30 minutes.
****This is me not swearing.