Comments (19)

By kilax, January 21, 2009 5:57 pm

Last November, when I was offered a new job, I decided to ask my boss out for “coffee” (I don’t drink coffee) to discuss the situation. I wanted to give him a heads up of what was going on, as well as ask his opinion on what I should do. I felt like he was a mentor, as well as a boss, and his opinion was (still is) highly important to me.

Of course… he thought I shouldn’t take it, that I would hate it, and it would ruin my career. Oh well. You’ll have that.

Anyway, we started to discuss my performance in the office. He had a lot of very nice things to say about me, but did mention one thing that bothered him – that I didn’t seem to be doing much research on my own about our profession outside of the office. That I wasn’t reading the trade magazines or coming up to him saying, “Did you read about that project at such and such location? What did you think about the glazing system they used? Blah blah blah.”

He was/is right. I’ve received an issue of Architectural Record every month since I’ve graduated. I never finish reading an issue. Sometimes, I don’t even open it! And I feel kind of guilty. And I feel kind of… not guilty.

I was so burned out at that job that I didn’t feel like devoting any extra time to personal, self-enriching career-related research. I often worked through my lunch break so that I would only have to work an 9-hour day. The last thing I wanted to do was spend what little free time I had thinking about work-related topics.

I kind of asked him when he expected me to be doing this research… because if he wanted me to sit around at work looking at trade magazines and websites, I would be more than happy to. But that wasn’t the case. I explained to him that I got home around 7:30 each night, ate dinner, exercised then went to bed. And yes, I do spend almost 3 hours on the train, but a lot of the time I am sleeping, because I only get 6 hours of sleep a night. So… wah. Wah wah wah.

I didn’t say it to him, but the thing is, I don’t want my career to define who I am. I want it to be a part of me, and I want to discuss it with people, and I want to love what I do (which I DO), but I don’t want to be… THAT architect. The one who lives for architecture. The one who devotes ALL OF THEIR TIME to being an architect. That’s just not me. I have too many other interests in my life that I want to devote my time to: travel, running, bowling, volunteering, restoring the Datsun (are you reading, Steven?), spending time with family and friends… you get the idea.

The funny thing is, now that I have a new job, and don’t feel so overwhelmed all the time, I think I COULD find time to read those trade magazines. And maybe I will.

Comments (20)

By kilax, December 17, 2008 5:36 am

I have a cubicle at my new office. It has a u-shaped work surface, tackable privacy panels, a lockable wardrobe, 2 pedestals, and filing cabinet.

I love it.

At my old office, we had an open work area – just long rows of desks. No dividers. No privacy. I didn’t mind it, but having a cubicle is a pretty big change for me, so I am using that as justification to write about how much I like it now.

I am all about personalization. I don’t want to go overboard, but I want to have a bit of personality in my workstation. At my old office, I was the only person who had photos on my desk (a digital photo frame). It wasn’t prohibited – I just think the open desks didn’t particularly lend themselves to that sort of… clutter.

Now, I have my digital photo frame out, a few photos on magnets, and some cute desk organizers. That’s it. It’s fun and simple and makes my desk feel more personal. And my workstation is big enough that I have space for these things.

I enjoy seeing what other people have in their cubicles – sports paraphernalia, family photos, architectural photos, fun magnets, holiday decorations, and so on. It’s a good way to start a conversation, and I think it livens up the space a bit.

Do you have anything personal on your desk at work? Or do you think it just lends itself to being clutter and a distraction?

Comments (16)

By kilax, December 11, 2008 8:27 pm

It’s really weird, starting a new job as Mrs. “Steven’s Last Name.” In fact, I haven’t become fully accustomed to it yet. As my new supervisor was introducing me to people on Monday, I just introduced myself as “Kim.” Only when they asked for my last name did I give it, after thinking about it for a split second. (It’s necessary to know the last name of the “Kims” – there are 4 or 5 others on my floor!)

I didn’t exclude Steven’s last name out of insult… I just really haven’t gotten used to it yet (well, obviously, if I am still calling it “his last name”). We got married in September of 2007, but I didn’t change my name until October of 2008. For various reasons. So, it’s a recent development.

Now it is almost 100% changed. The passport and a few various subscriptions and rewards cards remain. Ilax is now my middle name. Goodbye, Marie. (Sorry, mom)

So, having a “new” last name kind of adds to the fun of starting a new job. Because starting a new job is kind of like a chance to start over. You can be whoever you want! You can leave behind your bitchy ways (unlikely), be less of a goober (very unlikely),  quit it with the potty mouth (I’m trying!), work harder (not a problem, heh), be more social (also not a problem, HA!), etc. You get the idea.

I like that having a new last name means NO ONE from work knows about my website. If you search for my first name and Steven’s last name, it takes a long time to get to me. And the first correct hits are my 5K results. Ha! Anyone is welcome to see those! There is one post I wrote that reveals my last name, but I made it private.

Why do I desire to remove my “new” last name from public search? So that I can start to be a bit more candid here. I don’t plan to bash people I work with. In fact, I don’t plan to write about work at all.* I just want to be able to say I feel upset about things, like my problems with food, and not worry that my boss read it and thinks I’m a super weird-o. It’s a relief.

You know, it’s hard not to tell people about your blog. When they say “You ran a 5K as Santa? Are there any pics?” You want to say, “Yeah, go to www.ilaxstudio.com!” But, I won’t be saying THAT anymore. I’ll get used to it. It will be worth it.

So far, I am having a lot of fun my first week at work (hmm… is it a good thing to say you are having “fun” at work?!). My old office had 15 people on a full day, but the floor I work on now has almost 100 people. And we have at least 3 other floors in my building. It’s really fun to meet new people, share your interests, and discover their personalities.

I am in a training group, so there are a lot of social activities. Also, with it being the holidays, we have a lot of social events going on – 3 parties next week! And I even volunteered to help bartend at one. I also volunteered to help load the “letters-to-santa” gifts into the cars for delivery tomorrow. Yes, I like to get involved.

I can tell I am going to like the work, and the complexity of it. And I already know quite a bit about it because my previous employer was a contractor for where I work now (the naked truth comes out!). Of course, it being my first week, I am still filling out paper work and settling in. But I will let you all know how it goes. I really appreciated everyone’s support on Sunday’s post! It made me feel great!

*I work for the government now. Anything mentioned about work is going to be SUPER SUPER SUPER GENERIC. P.S. Did I tell you that I work just a few floors under Mr. President-Elect, Barack Obama?

What is with the two annoying super-long posts in a row? A-N-N-O-Y-I-N-G!!!

Comments (34)

By kilax, December 7, 2008 9:57 pm

So, what is the big decision I’ve alluded to a few times that had me all stressed out and feeling guilty?

I’m starting a new job tomorrow.

Yeah, it’s not really a big deal to start a new job. Because usually, when you start a new job, you were looking for one, or you hated your boss, or you were bored to death.

But I didn’t have any of that. I was happy at work, but this opportunity fell into my lap, and I had to ask myself “Would I regret not taking this job in a few months?” The answer was yes.

It took me a long time to make the decision though. It wasn’t as easy as following my gut. I wasn’t used to putting that much thought into a decision.

The decision-making process really stressed me out, especially since I talked to my bosses about it first, who I think were somewhat shocked. Then… I was at work for another three to four weeks while I waited to get clearance for the new job.

So, this last month has kind of been hell. I’ve just felt so guilty about making the decision to try something new… and to leave a firm I really care about.

And some people weren’t so nice to me about it. But that’s okay. A lot of other people were really supportive, and I appreciate that. You all know who you are – thank you.

When I was making the decision, I realized that the two most important opinions in my life are mine and my husbands. No one else is 100% considering my best interest when they give me advice. Even Steven probably isn’t from time to time.

I don’t say that to put down the other people that are close to me in my life. I am just trying to say that the only person’s approval I look for, if anyone’s, beside my own, is my husband’s. I want him to be proud of me, and back the decisions I make. He was very supportive throughout the whole process, and that made me feel so much better.

Sometimes, we live our lives for someone else’s approval. We are always trying to please other people. It’s important to think about whose approval you really want. I realized that I was prone to want to make decisions based on what other people would approve of. I had to make the decision that was best for me, and it was hard. It made me feel awful.

Anyway. Tomorrow is my first day. I am excited to start something new!

Comments (10)

By kilax, October 28, 2008 1:07 pm

While reviewing my senior portfolio, one of my college professors (a mentor, really) advised me not to go into a specialized field when making my “first job out of college” decision. He explained that he worked for a firm in Chicago known for designing skyscrapers. After he left that firm, every other place he worked for wanted him to design skyscrapers – even if other projects were going on in the office.

I was walking to work yesterday thinking about this. I passed a building that is being renovated – they are tearing down the exterior to install new offices.

Seeing that made me think about the fact that all I do is interior build-outs. We don’t do any “ground-up” construction. I am only getting experience in… a somewhat specialized field. I wonder if I should be trying to learn other things.

I wonder if I should take my professor’s advice.

I should just be cautious.

I love what I do and really like the people I work with. I just think about these things… from time to time.

Comments (15)

By kilax, October 1, 2008 12:33 pm

I know I’ve complained a couple of times about being treated/feeling like a youngling.

But today, I was grateful to play the “young and inexperienced” card by saying to someone, “Did I submit the application incorrectly? Is that why it is taking so long? Is there anything else I can do?”

I really wanted to say, “You’ve been sitting on this SIMPLE application for TWO weeks. You are holding my client back from starting their demolition. What the eff is the holdup?! I know it shouldn’t take this long!!!”

Okay, being rude is NEVER acceptable, no matter your age. But, come on.

Side Story: Yesterday at work, I was sitting at my desk (diligently working) and fantasizing thinking “Soup sounds so good. Why don’t Steven and I ever make soup at home?”

Imagine my surprise when I came home, and Steven had a big pot of homemade soup on the stove, filling our house with wonderful aromas! THIS MAN CAN READ MY MIND. Is that good, or bad?

Comments (18)

By kilax, August 21, 2008 1:09 pm

We have monthly “birthday celebrations” in my office during the months that the staff has birthdays. The company orders treats and we all sit around in the conference room, chatting for about 30 minutes (or more!) while enjoying the treats. It’s actually a nice break, to just sit and chat with everyone. I think of it as a morale booster.

Sometimes the company orders individual treats, like drinks from Starbucks (bleh), and sometimes they order one big thing, like a coffee cake.

You may recall that I am on a “healthy lifestyle” quest. Whenever they order individual treats, I try to order something healthy or low in calories, like a fruit cup or a diet soda.

Today was the August celebration (duh) and our receptionist/secretary/all-star came up to me and said, “I’m going to order that cinnamon-cake thing from Corner Bakery. Do you want a fruit cup, since you are so being so good [healthy-eating wise]?”

She didn’t say it meanly – she was being nice. She noticed I’ve been watching what I eat, and actually asked me if I wanted an alternate item for the birthday celebration. I thought it was very nice that she provided that option for me, because some people are actually pretty mean when you are eating healthy. They become “food pushers” who want you to eat what they are eating or what they are making. I’m happy no one in my office is like that.

But damn, that cake smelled good when I was sitting there eating my fruit cup!

And a little bit of housekeeping… called “How I Blog.” Continue reading 'Fruit Cup'»

Comments (27)

By kilax, June 19, 2008 5:43 am

One of the things I love about my job is that I get to go into all these neat buildings in Chicago. It’s great to see all the different architectural styles… but what I really love are the amazing views.

Can you imagine this being the view from your office?

It’s really fun to think about what people will see from their workspace. I think it really affects the way you work. I know I really enjoy working in an open office, with full height windows on two complete sides. We don’t have a cool view of the lake or anything though. You can see the Sears Tower… but only when you go stand in one corner!

What’s your workspace like (whether at work, or your office at home)? Do you think it’s important to have sunlight and a view? Or do you not care either way?

Side Note I: I saw this parked in front of the Board of Trade yesterday. I want.

Side Note II: I’m having a really hard time staying caught up with blogs, leaving comments, responding to comments, writing anything worthwhile here, and responding to emails lately. My apologies. Please don’t take it personally. I am trying to catch up, but can’t find the time (it’s all that GD bowling!).

Comments (12)

By kilax, June 18, 2008 8:03 am

Great.

All that time I spent this morning finding the right outfit to wear to my meeting? Wasted.

Apparently, my shirt is somewhat see-through.

Why don’t I ever realize these things before I get to work?

When will this week ever end?!

Comments (6)

By kilax, June 5, 2008 5:55 am

I hate it when I plan on attending something, or even make an appointment to attend something, and don’t feel like going to it at the last minute. That happened a lot in college. I would plan on attending a guest lecture or something, then decide I’d rather stay at home and have dinner, work, relax, eat, whatever (of course, I still went to Michael Moore, Barack Obama, Morgan Spurlock and Steven Holl’s lectures).

Lately it’s been these townhome association meetings. Well, there have only been two of them, but they are at 7:00 pm, require me leaving work at 5:00, and eat up more of my night then I’d like. But hey, if we’re going to bitch and moan about what’s going on in our neighborhood, we better make an appearance at the meetings, and become involved, right?

Anyway, I told one of our reps I would go out to lunch with her today. This will probably be good for me to learn to be social and interact with other people in the industry, but when I woke up today… I just didn’t feel like it. I think I’d rather sit at my desk and sleep eat. Or stay at home and sleep. Or something like that.

I’m sure by lunch time I’ll feel like doing it. But right now, I just feel BLAH.