Comments (44)

By kilax, February 12, 2014 5:14 pm

NO.

Alright bloggers, tell me, when you see those emails in your inbox like “XYZ product on [your blog name]!!!” or “Let’s collaborate, [your blog name]!!!” or “Event for [your blog name] readers!!!” do you feel…
a. excitement?
b. cautious optimism?
c. humor?
d. trepidation?
e. annoyance?
f. combo of the above?
g. none of the above?

I have to say, I’m a combo (f) of humor, trepidation and annoyance. I get so many goofy requests (as I’m sure you all do!) that most things coming in get an eye roll before they’re opened.

My policy is similar to my reaction when asked to allow guest posts on random topics from random strangers… I also don’t want to promote things here that I have no interest in, or have no intention of using/doing. Promoting it would make me feel fake, and like I’m being used. Which I would be. Promoting something I believe in makes me feel good. But… that’s not what we’re talking about here.

Sometimes I feel like an ass when someone contacts me and asks me to write about their race, because they’re nice about it, and it’s a legit thing. The race is for running – I run! The race is in Chicago – I live near Chicago! It makes so much sense!

No, not really. Even though it’s simple information sharing, that doesn’t mean I have to do that here – ilaxSTUDIO is not a public bulletin board. And that’s the thing. I get to say what I want here (and yes – anyone can also email me anything they want) and I highly value that. I am in a lot of situations where I am made to do something I don’t want to do.* And that just eats away at me. This is the place where I get to do whatever I want, and I’m going to keep it that way.

And besides, they always email these requests** to more than one person and get their word out through someone!

What do you guys think? Am I missing opportunities? Or do you have a similar mindset? (Of course, keep in mind I’m not trying to grow my blog, make money off it, or build a “brand”).

Thank you to all those silly email requests for inspiring this post!

*I really struggle with being told what to do, in some instances.
**And I’m talking ALL requests, not just “mention our race,” but for example, the one I got to write about the “perfect Valentine’s Day gift” with links, of course. No effin’ way. The garbage you see here is completely my own, not what someone else told me to write.

Comments (70)

By kilax, January 24, 2014 6:50 am

This is not going to be a popular (heh) opinion, but when all those “vote for me”s for the Run to Napa ZOOMA women’s race trip starting showing up in my Facebook feed this week, I got a sick feeling to my stomach. Not that people were entering. It sounds like a super fun trip if you like wine and running, and heck, I wish all of my friends who wanted to go, could, and for free.

It was the fact that the page asks you to vote for your favorite blogger, and shows your vote number right by your photo, allowing you to compare yourself to everyone else in the contest. It’s a simple popularity contest. And that is what gave me that icky feeling – the contest reminded me of a part of blogging I try to avoid – the quest for popularity.

And I by NO MEANS have anything against ZOOMA doing this or anyone who has entered – just seeing it made me think about it.

There are lots of these contests online, and they have never bugged me like this.  I have voted for people before (I don’t think I have ever entered) and sincerely hoped my vote would help! Maybe it’s just that I know so many people who have entered in this one – and really, that they know each other. These bloggers are friendly, and will congratulate and feel happy for whoever wins. But I bet there will be some disappointment, and comparison. 

And that is probably it. Bloggers quite often talk about avoiding comparison. And that number count sure does encourage it, even if it’s friendly, and all in good fun. 

It’s made me think – what can we do to make sure blogging doesn’t turn in to a popularity contest? Or does that even matter?

Most of us say we don’t feel upset if a post doesn’t get many comments, a Facebook entry doesn’t get many likes, or a tweet doesn’t get many responses (just guessing on that one since I’m not on Twitter). We say we do it for ourselves. And mostly, we do! Truly.

But come on. 

We notice when a fellow blogger, especially one we are close with, seems to have oodles and oodles of followers/commenters/whatever-ers. Guys, I’ll be real! I see myself doing it from time to time! I read other blog comments thinking “Wow, they have a lot of commenters!” and “Whoa, who are all these people?” and feel bad for a few seconds (then remember to feel grateful people read this, and even comment, at all! ha!). I think it’s in human nature. And… all those followers/commenters help in a contest like this. And might make some people feel really bad if they don’t get many votes.

But there are so many blogs out there, and the cool thing is, each one is of different value to a different person. Sometimes you find a person you totally connect with and wonder why many others don’t read them. Sometimes you question why big bloggers get the amount of comments they do, with the crap they write. Sometimes, you will meet cool people and get to know them in real life, then love reading their blog even more!

So, my hope, when seeing this contest, is that people don’t let those votes influence the value of their blog or content, to them. That they don’t get caught up in a popularity contest, and feel bad. That they be themselves. BE GENUINE. That they enjoy the writing. The readers who are meant to find them, will. 

Comments (42)

By kilax, January 23, 2014 12:26 pm

… from my earlier post. Ha ha. Because three more bullets would have been RIDICULOUS.

• It’s always nice to get a response to a comment you leave on a blog! I’ve been trying to reply to the comments I receive more quickly, to encourage interaction. Do you like it when blog authors comment in a more timely fashion so you can keep the conversation going, while the post is still “current”? Or do you not give a crap? 
• So, how annoying is it to have an instructor in a fitness class who tells stories/makes bad jokes? Sometimes I am soooo hyper when I teach, and little stories/jokes just come out. I try to keep it to a minimum. But I also don’t want to teach a silent class. Besides the music playing, I am usually counting (including missing numbers), reminding what the proper form is, and telling people where they should be feeling the exercise. 

• One of my BIGGEST pet peeves is when people pluralize/make possessive proper nouns/names that are singular. Ha. I am sure I messed up a ton of English rules in how I wrote that (and probably didn’t even get it right), so let me know if I bug YOU! But anyway, some examples would be calling Aldi Aldi’s, or Panera Panera’s, or JCPenney Penney’s. Why does this make me bonkers?! Grr! Anyway, dear readers, please let me know if you have any incorrectly pluralized/made possessive instances like this for me to add to my list. I am doing research on it, and am going to write a book. Just kidding*. But I was wondering if there are any others I should watch out for and correct people on**. <— me so nice

*But I would be curious to know what is up with that. I understand an older generation doing that, as they may be more accustomed to stores being owned by someone, and the store name being a possessive name. Maybe. But why do younger people do it?! WHY DOES IT BOTHER ME SO?!?!
**Ha ha. So I called my mom’s mom*** out on this, saying “You don’t make things singular that already are possessive, so why do the opposite?!” And she is so funny, she called to tell me, she was going to “Kohl.” Not Kohl’s, but Kohl. So now we call it Kohl. 
***She also calls a sandwich at Subway, a subway, not a sub. So I tease her about this, too. She finds it amusing. Thankfully. Ha ha. Because I HAVE to tease. IT’S MY ONLY WAY OF COPING.****
****Note: I am trying to be funny with most of this. Trying. 

Comments (20)

By kilax, November 27, 2013 6:22 am

Don’t worry! This is not a how-to… as usual, I am just asking you guys what you think!

The other day I posted this on my personal Facebook page:

Update: a lot of gifts are ordered. I am getting there! And Anne said she would help me wrap gifts in late December. Schweet!

It was kind of weird that I posted a link to my blog on my personal Facebook page, which I don’t think I’ve ever done before. I like to keep the two Facebook pages separate (for work privacy reasons, and to avoid content duplicity). 

But a lot of people post their blog links on their personal Facebook page, or post the same content on their personal page and their blog page. And I imagine some people post the same content across all platforms (blog, Facebook, Instagram, Twitter… what else is there?).

So I was just wondering, if you use more than one social media platform, how do you decide what to post, where? 

I keep my blog to one-topic posts (unless it’s Random Thoughts Thursday) that I have a bit to say about. I use my Facebook blog page to link to those posts and to post little things that I won’t blog about, or share links. So, I think of the Facebook page as supplemental “content.”

And my personal Facebook page… sigh. I would really like to go off Facebook, but I keep it going because I use it so much for my work as a personal trainer at Essential Fitness. And actually, my issue is separate from the question I asked above (ha ha, oops), since I am only on two platforms – the blog & Facebook. I struggle with what to post on the same platform. Since I started a Facebook page for my blog in June of 2012, I sometimes have a hard time deciding what to post there and what to post on my personal page. I try not to double post too much. Or if I post about the same thing on both, say something different or use a different picture. 

And yes! This post is completely hypocritical because I am doing exactly what I said I try not to – recycling “content” someplace else! Ha ha!

As always, this blog and the social media stuff is just for fun. I am not losing sleep over all this. Just wondering what your thought process is behind it all, if you use the same platforms – or especially if you use more! And since I obviously overthink everything, this post will probably help you understand why I stick to two platforms!

Comments (41)

By kilax, September 9, 2013 6:49 am

Have you ever read a blog you felt had a particularly hostile/negative (pissed off?) tone? Did you keep reading it? Was it this blog? (I kid, I kid… I hope)

I’m not talking a random rant or “woe is me” post. We all have bad days (weeks? months?)!

I’m talking about the blogs where the person seems to find the negative in everything. There’s always something.

It’s odd this bothers me so much – I highly value honesty over a false illusion of it always being rainbows and unicorns.

But damn. Sometimes I’m just like, “Really?! Everything bothers you!”* 

Then I can’t read the blog anymore (just like I can’t stand these peeps irl). I start to pick up on every, single, dang, little negative thing.

That seems unfair. Maybe I don’t “get” the blogger?

Maybe I don’t want to?

Of course, I was thinking about this in the whole “spot it, got it” respect. I’ve had people tell me I’m negative. I don’t think I am.

Yet, I wrote a post last night saying using the word “marathon” in a road distance that isn’t 26.2 miles bothers me. I have a race report coming saying I don’t think age group medals mean anything for me (but that it’s a lot of fun to get them!).

Those could been seen as negative turn off posts to others, whereas to me, I’m thinking I’m just starting a convo and there’s always a possibility my views could change.

And sometimes I wonder if what I think is sarcasm or me being funny (well, trying) comes off as negativity. 

Hmm. 

What’s the point of this post? Eh, just me saying negativity irks me. But dishonesty does more, so while I consciously try not to be negative, being honest always wins. Here, anyway. 

Stay tuned for a post about being honest in social media versus fabricating the best version of your life. 

Just kidding, I’m not going to write that post.** 

Or maybe I will! It’s hard to get me to shut up. 

*And I often honestly worry that the person is very unhappy with life.
**And that is the advantage (fun?) of social media, anyway!

Comments (20)

By kilax, August 23, 2013 12:24 pm

Maggie‘s post yesterday stirred up some thoughts about blog privacy that have been whirling around in my head. Maggie mentioned that she has cut back on posting, and has been feeling more like keeping some things to herself than sharing with total strangers or people who only know her from her blog. 

Lately, I have been thinking about how I forget who reads my blog. In my mind, I am writing to the commenters – because that is who I interact with. But a lot of people read and don’t comment. Family, other bloggers, people I work out with, complete strangers… what impression does my blog leave of my real life persona, to them? And do I care?

It seems… somewhat naive to post in this way. To write without a large portion of your audience in mind. 

But, that is my style. I am very open. I write when I am inspired. I put it out there with little editing. I sometimes ask people to proof read my posts, but lately, I act, then think.

I hope I don’t offend too many. Hee hee. 

So, as you can see, I typically start to think about the privacy thing, then tell myself, “Well, you feel good with what you write. And you still have secrets that you keep to yourself, so it’s not like it’s all out there.” And there are a lot of things that happen that I don’t record here – this isn’t a diary. 

It’s funny though, because I am protective/private of certain information, around certain people, in real life. It’s those relationships where there is no point in sharing – the person will only use the information against you, or (even worse?) not acknowledge it at all.*

Anyway. I am pretty open online, and plan to remain so, even though I don’t know who is reading this. And I appreciate Maggie’s point of view on it, and the conversations we have had about the topic as well.***

Do you ever stop and think about who is reading your blog, before you hit publish? Do you think a lot of people read and don’t comment?

Ha. I always miss delurker day – when you ask people who usually don’t comment, to say hi!

I feel like this post could begin to discuss social media and privacy and what you share (names, pictures, locations, etc.), but, ugh. Me lazy. 

Darn, since no photo, here is the cake I made for Maggie yesterday, for her birthday. Gee. Maybe the birthday girl should have been in the photo?!

*This makes me sound really negative and paranoid. I’m not (?). I am just talking about forced relationships (that we all have!), mostly, where you are polite and give each other details of your life, and I have just learned with certain people, giving more information opens up the doors for unwanted judgement. It’s kind of a personality thing in the other person.**
**It could never be me, right? Ha ha.
***Hmm, I must have written about this before, because we talked about this over the winter. 

Comments (31)

By kilax, August 12, 2013 6:27 am

A follow up on the “Responsible commenting” post… also, I promise I don’t take blogging this seriously. Just a random (long?) thought that popped in to my head!

You guys left wonderful comments on my (first) Friday post about reading a blog post by someone and getting a feeling that something isn’t right, but the blogger is trying to push it aside, and then wondering what you should say, if anything.

A few people asked if I commented or reached out to the blogger. I didn’t. Which makes me (sound like?) a hypocrite, because it was the type of thing I would comment on, IF, it was a blog I read/commented on regularly. But it isn’t. And the casually mentioned issue was an injury, probably due to over training/not enough rest. I don’t think a first comment of “Have you thought about seeing a doctor/taking some rest days?” would bode well.

The comment (well, part of) Declan left on my post made me think about this more:

But I sometimes feel like I am overstepping my boundaries, as who am I to give people advice that likely have been running and such much longer than me.

I think Declan is right – people who have been doing an activity for a longer time may be annoyed by well intended “advice” from novices/anyone who has done said activity for less time. Even if that “more experienced” someone may need to have it pointed out that they are over doing it.

I was thinking, with so many bloggers out there, there are so many various levels of experience. And it’s easy to look at a blog post of someone with more experience than you, and think that you can do the same – because even though you haven’t been at it as long as them, you might have some things in common with them.

I wrote in my response to Declan’s comment – I do A LOT of stupid crap that a beginning runner shouldn’t, because I know my body can handle it. Upping my weekly mileage by a lot, random long runs, double workouts, and so on. I really hope no one reads my blog and thinks “I should follow Kim’s plan*.”** 

But back to what Declan said about experience – I’ve had my stupid years of too much too soon and the subsequent injury. I learned my lesson. I got in to a good groove with strength training and found out if I treat my body well, I can get away with a lot of exercise – if it’s not too intense.

I really don’t think anyone should look at another person’s blog and try to do exactly what they do – everyone is so different. We can look for inspiration and ideas, but should really modify things to fit our capabilities.

But that must be why people have the  “I am not a ‘such and such'” disclaimers*** on their blogs – because people do read blogs and think to copy what someone else is doing, whether or not it will work for them.  Some of you have those disclaimers- what made you think to add it?

Anyway. Just thinking about responsible blogging, and what you put out there, that others might see, and try to copy, and might not be good for them. Kind of like the “don’t try this at home” disclaimers you see sometimes. 

It seems silly/conceited to me to think that others would want to do what I do, but people talk about reading blogs for inspiration/ideas, so there must be some of that going on in the blogosphere! Ha ha. I don’t plan on changing my blogging style soon though, or what I share. 

Data does has advice for you. He says, don’t do this, especially if the cat has all its claws:

*Um… there really isn’t one either. I kind of wing it. 
**And at the same time, I am sure people have read my blog and thought, “what the heck, Kim is going to get injured!” 
***I am talking about the “I am not a registered dietitian,” “I am not a running coach,” “I am not a certified personal trainer” (except, that one doesn’t apply to me) and so on type disclaimers.

Comments (40)

By kilax, August 9, 2013 12:13 pm

= annoying commenting?

Have you ever read a blog post by someone and gotten a feeling that something isn’t right, but the blogger is trying to push it aside? Maybe they are an athlete who is injured, but pushing through the pain and potentially making it worse. Or they obsess about food and give hints of an eating disorder. Or maybe they talk about feeling alone and you think maybe they are depressed and headed to a dark place.  You feel concerned. 

I know. We’re not doctors. We’re not nutritionists. We’re not therapists. 

And it’s so easy to read it to someone’s story online. They choose what to share. We don’t have the full picture. 

But sometimes I see these hints of something. Something that makes me worry about this person. Because if I read their blog, and comment on it, I care about them. Even if I don’t know them in real life. 

I was thinking about this, as I saw a post (from someone who does not read this blog, nor is it a blog I comment on) where someone casually mentioned a serious issue in the middle of all the text.

But the post seemed to be written in such a way to minimize that issue. So most of the responses were “way to go” comments on the content of the rest of the post. 

And that is the great thing about blogging – we can totally try to direct the conversation in a certain way. We can minimize what we want to. We can leave details out. We can pretend. We can make up any story. 

But I can’t overlook that little blurb about the issue. I read it, and alarms go off. 

And I can’t help but say something. So is that responsible commenting? Ha ha. Or is that just me, being annoying, and butting in?

Because why else would the person share it?

Yeah, I am probably reading in to things way too much, but as I had run across these feeling many times before, I thought I would put it out there. 

When you see something you personally think is a sign of a bigger issue do you comment about that? Or are you actually able to “mind your own business”?*

*But why would people write it, if not to have people comment on it, discuss it (if comments are open)?

Comments (87)

By kilax, July 22, 2013 6:28 am

Yo!

It’s my eight year blogiversary!

It was actually yesterday, but, duh, I had to post my training recap then. I know if I didn’t you guys would be really disappointed.

Riiight. 

I actually missed my seven year blogiversary last year, and never did anything to celebrate my readers, so this year, I wanted to make sure I didn’t slack. 

So! I have EIGHT different prizes and EIGHT different people will win. How did I select the prizes? They either reflect my interests or are some of my favorite products. 

Note: I will be funding these all. 

EXTRA SPECIAL NOTE: check out the bonus entry option below – for every $5 donated to Anne‘s fundraising page for the Chicago Lung Run, you get FIVE extra entries. FIVE. That is a lot, yo. 

And now… on to the prizes!

#1 – My two favorite OPI colors – DS Classic and DS Extravagance, and Ridge Filler (for the base).
#2 – GustBuster 43″ umbrella – AVAILABLE IN MULTIPLE COLORS. I thought umbrellas sucked until Steven’s dad got me this one for Christmas. It’s an umbrella that ACTUALLY works! If you ever have to go to downtown Chicago on a rainy day, you know how special this is. Ha. 
#3 – $25 iTunes giftcard. 
#4 – Star Wars Chop Sticks and Millenium Falcon Ice Cube Tray. 
#5 – Lousiville Vegan Jerky Co. Bourbon Smoked Black Pepper Jerky from FakeMeats.com.
#6 – Gorjana Bloom Hexagon Stud Earrings (if available). 
#7 – BibFOLIO (your choice).
#8 – Surprise based on whomever wins… (unfortunately, is NOT a date with Henry Cavill).

SUPER BLOGIVERSARY GIVEAWAY!!!!!!!! Rules

1. Eight readers will receive a prize. Which prize received will be determined by the order that person’s name is drawn – the first person gets prize #1, the second person gets prize #2, and so on. 
2. REQUIRED to enter the giveaway: leave a comment telling me you want to enter. Yes, it is that easy.
   
3. For a bonus entry: get 5 extra entries for every $5 donated to Anne’s lung run fundraising page (click here). 
4. You can leave all entry comments in ONE comment if you’d like.
5. This giveaway is open until 12:00 PM CST on Friday July 26. I will announce the winner on Saturday July 27 (or earlier, if I feel ambitious).
6. Random.org will pick the eight winners. 
7. This giveaway is open to all US readers.

Comments (34)

By kilax, July 11, 2013 6:27 am

• Guys! Thank you for putting up with my crap writing lately. I know it’s not my best. Writing here is very habitual for me… and also compulsive. I want to write most days, and I enjoy it. But I know my posts have been disjointed. I keep publishing them, because I have a tendency to disappear in the summer if I stop writing for a few days. Do you notice blogging trends in the summer? It sometimes seems like there are less posts in the summer – people are spending more time outside, maybe?
• My dad has been following this plan to get ready for our 5K on the 27th. I think he is already at the end of week two? Gah! I am so proud of him. All it took was a little whiny “this would be a great birthday present for me” text (to which his response was, “What? My death?” Sigh. No. “An actual blood family member doing a race with me.”) I sent my dad a box of running clothes. I asked him to model them in pics for the blog. Still waiting on those pics, Dad!
• I think it’s ironic that I feel guilty for taking the time to exercise when my ACE exam is two weeks from today… because a personal trainer would help a client figure out how to fit exercise in during busy times! I think I mostly feel bad because I have said no to so much social stuff, including my aunt’s retirement party in Iowa, Mötley Crüe tickets (also in Iowa), stand up paddle boarding (in Chicago), a Spartan race (in some Illinois town in the middle of nowhere)… ugh. I have to stay close to home to get my workouts in, then get back to STUDYING!
• Mica made me this beautiful infinity scarf in my favorite color! I love it! What a thoughtful gift! (Okay, I may or may have not rudely asked her to make me one…)

A few interesting articles from the past week

• After reading this article (pdf here), I think I found how I need to align my skillset – use my office architectural skills to design office space for fitness companies.
• ESPN Body Issue – holy cow, I was super inspired by these beautiful athlete’s bodies
• Facebook Infographic on Active Cities – wow! Facebook is compiling interesting information! Facebook ranked the top 10 fittest cities based on three months of fitness related check-in activity. I was REALLY surprised by the cities on this list. 
• The ACE manual says the best way to get used to the heat is to acclimate to it and drink a lot of water (when working out). This article (pdf here) says the same thing, including that it takes healthy people 10-14 days to acclimate. How long to you think it takes you to acclimate to hot weather?
• I thought this article (pdf here) about CPR stats was interesting. Basically – the survival rate is not as high as you’d think, based on what you see in movies and on TV. I definitely thought about that when I took CPR training.

Other Random Thoughts Thursday Posts: 44, 43, 42, 41, 40, 39, 38, XXXVII, XXXVI, XXXV, XXXIV, XXXIII, XXXII, XXXI, XXX, XXIX, XVIII, XXVII, XXVI, XXV, XXIV, XXIII, XXII, XXI, XX, XIX, XVIII, XVII, XVI, XV, XIV, XIII, XII, XI, X, IX, VIII, VII, VI, V, IV, III, II, I.