How “strict” of a vegan are you, Kim?
A coworker made this celery root soup recipe* over the weekend and wanted to share it with me and another coworker (who recently became vegan). Apparently, the recipe takes quite a bit of work, and she knew we would appreciate it.
The problem? She ran out of veggie broth and had to use some chicken broth.
She was kind enough to “disclose” this info to us. I felt awful turning her down when she told me. “You’re that strict?!” she asked? Yes, I am.
I try to follow a vegan diet as closely as I can – avoiding eggs, dairy and honey.** Of course, I know there are going to be slip-ups. We were using Fleischmann’s margarine for awhile until we realized the D3 listed as an ingredient was from FISH (yeah, it’s not even vegetarian – D2 is okay, D3 is not). I just realized the Morningstar crumbles are not vegan, so I have been using TVP instead (worked well on pizza this weekend!). I am learning as I go.
However, if I know a food item has eggs, dairy or honey in it, I will absolutely avoid it. Especially if it has something like chicken broth in it.
I feel like there is a difference between choosing to ignore something and ignorance.
I do cut myself some slack, but yes, I try to be 99.9% vegan (as Lacey wrote in a recent comment). I think I can call myself a vegan, even though I have made these “mistakes.” I cannot be perfect.
This incident got me thinking about the unpublished post I was referring to in this post. It was about being labeled as vegetarian or vegan, and what that label means, and if it is valid. Should you call yourself vegetarian if you occasionally eat meat? (In my opinion, no). Should we have labels at all? I fear that post will never get published. I am not eloquent with words, nor a good debater, and I just can’t get my thoughts together.
Anyway, so I feel kind of bad turning down this person’s offerings… but at the same time, I kind of don’t feel bad. I have made a decision for myself, and at this time, it is important that I stick to it.
Do you ever feel bad turning down food that someone is offering you? What makes YOU turn down food?
*Ironically, this is a recipe from Tal Ronnen. I really want to check out his book – The Conscious Cook. Has anyone been using it?
**And other animal products (like leather) and products tested on animals (like shampoo).
Themocracy
Although, I am neither a vegan or a vegetarian, I have had experiences with having to turn someone’s food down because of my diabetes.
I never feel bad about turning someone’s food down. The only time I do it, is when it is unhealthy for me, not because I have a personal dislike for what they fixed. If it is a personal dislike, I will out of politeness eat it.
Because of my diabetes there are some obvious things that I cannot/should not eat. A lot of people do not realize that things loaded with carbohydrates are among those. Pastas, potatoes, and the like. Also fruits, especially when I am on a course of steroids for my asthma (steroids raise blood sugar drastically).
Once when my husband I had been invited to a meal at a friend’s house, I had to turn down the majority of what was offered. They had even gone out of their way to buy sugar free cookies and fruit for dessert. I had to explain to them that the sugar free cookies were actually worse than the regular cookies, because they replaced the sugar with more carbohydrates, so in essence they ended up with more sugar, and because I was on a course of steroids, as much as I love fruit, I could not have any.
I have even had to turn down food my father has made. He smoked a salmon, but he had put some sort of praliene marinade on it. Obviously, it was loaded with sugar.
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I honestly would not think of the carbohydrates thing either!
I have gotten to the point where I don’t feel bad if I go somewhere and there is nothing for me to eat (which it sounds like is similar to how you feel) – I don’t expect people to accommodate me! But when they go out of their way to make something and I still don’t want to eat it… like in the example, I guess that is when I feel bad. Kind of 😉
Instead of looking at it like you are turning it down because you don’t want to eat it, you are turning it down because you cannot eat it. You believe living a vegan lifestyle is good for your health (I assume) so you are not turning it down because of not wanting it, you are turning it down because of your health. I bet then you would feel better about turning it down.
Carbohydrates are energy food. They are energy food because when your body processes them they turn into sugar. That is why they are not good for the diabetic. Amazingly enough, everything we eat has a measure of carbohydrates in it, even vegetables, some have loads more than others. So when figuring out how much insulin to give myself at a meal, I have to have a basic knowledge of how many carbs are in each type of food.
Corn is a very starchy food, I cannot eat much of it. Popcorn however is slightly different. Because it is puffed up with air, I can eat that with no problem, as long as I stay within serving size. A serving size of popcorn is larger than you think. Just has you have had to educate yourself about what you can eat as a vegan, I have had to do the same with the diabetes.
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I for one would love to read the post you wrote on this topic and haven’t published yet. It is a thorny problem for anyone who has dietary restrictions for whatever reason. As you know I have a lot of issues with my in-laws on this point! I feel terribly guilty turning down food and it made me feel terrible when one of my best friends told me it made her sad that I went vegan because she was afraid to invite me to her house because she just didn’t know what to make for me! Personally I also do not expect anyone to make special dishes for me – I tell them I am perfectly happy with veggies! I have found that offering to bring a dish is sometimes a good solution – then you are sure there will be something you can eat, plus you can let other people try some yummy vegan dishes. With regards to the dilemma in your post, knowing myself I probably would have had a small portion of her soup – so yeah, sometimes I will put my principles aside when someone has made something with love. I do this with my mother in law and her cake, which has eggs (they are eggs from their own chickens who live a long and happy life in a big wild back yard). I ate the salmon spread that my good friend’s six year old daughter made for Christmas because she was so proud of it and really wanted me to taste it. I figure that my overall diet is so much healthier, animal friendly, and environmentally responsible than the average person that I can justify these “slips” from time to time. For the rest I do the very best I can!
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Steven has been asking me a lot lately if I would eat eggs if we had our own hens. I just don’t know if I would! I would definitely be more likely to.
You are so nice to try things when people make them for you out of the generosity of their heart! Do you ever worry that makes them think they can start doing it more often? You know, “well, she ate eggs last time, so I can use them now and she won’t care…”
Wow that is a tough one indeed I always feel bad no matter what. We’re human right 🙂
I would never expect a vegan to eat something that had any animal product in it. Sounds like your coworker didn’t quite understand how people approach veganism. (It’s not like a diet, where you might have a little bit of sugar or something). But that was awfully nice of her to go to the trouble. Maybe you could ask her for the recipe?
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I think she thinks it IS a diet, becuase she became vegan for a few months, then sort of stopped. So… she was vegan for a bit, but for different reasons!
I did confirm that was the recipe with her. 🙂
I eat a mainly vegetarian diet, but I do eat fish and dairy. I have more flexibility there, so that isn’t such a source of guilt for me. But I have really struggled in the past with feeling guilty (or feeling like people are looking at me funny) when I have to turn down things that bother my stomach…and there are a lot of them! Since being diagnosed with IBS and then diagnosed with gluten intolerance, this has been much easier. I feel like the label or the medical diagnosis gives me some legitimacy with the food requests I make. I understand what your saying.
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I label myself a vegetarian but probably shouldn’t because I’m not 100% strict all of the time. Like at Thanksgiving, my grandmother made an amazing vegetable soup but used chicken broth. I love this soup and love my grandmother (who even commented that she made vegetable soup especially for me) and so had a bowl.
Would I prefer to be all-veg, all the time? Yes. But it’s about making the best decisions I can every day and it was more important to share that soup with my grandmother than stick to a 100% veg diet.
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That is what I was trying to figure out in that post I didn’t publish. If you eat soup with chicken broth once a year, are you a vegetarian? What if you consume meat only once a month – are you then?
If you (hypothetically, not you specifically) eat meat every once in awhile, then you are probably a flexitarian. But what about your situation? Ugh. I just don’t know.
There was a really interesting post on Digging Through the Dirt called “Flexitarians Actually Omnivores Trying to Be Hip.” I think this is a surprisingly touchy subject.
In answer to your question, I do worry sometimes the people won’t take me seriously if I do make exceptions from time to time – plus I feel guilty in regards to people I know who do manage to uphold their principles and be super vigilant all the time. However, at the end of the day, I think we just have to do the best we can and not be too hard on ourselves. And yes, this is a very touchy subject, when it really shouldn’t be because after all it is each person’s own choice to put what they choose into their body. But it seems that sometimes our choices can be terribly offensive to other people. I try to be pretty low key about my choices and not make a big stink about it. But then I think, why should it bother my mother in law so much that I won’t eat meat? Well, she grew up on a farm in postwar Flanders, where everyone had to scrape by and meat was considered a luxury and very nutritious. By not eating the precious food she and my father in law offer to us when we visit, I am turning down their love. I could so relate to Jonathan Safran Foer’s stories about his grandmother in “Eating Animals”!!
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I definitely agree – everyone should do what is right for them! And they should take you seriously, no matter what “is right for you” is!
I have to step back and remember where that mindset, like your MiL, and Foer’s grandma have, comes from. I forget that the things weren’t always they way they are now. You know, ridiculous amounts of food to choose from (especially in the US!).
I feel bad about it with family and friends – but I think that the longer I am a vegan (since it has only been 3ish months), the less bad I will feel about it. Is that weird? This Christmas my mom-in-law bought all these things that she thought would be vegan, but either hadn’t looked at ingredient lists (like Great Harvest bread that was brushed with egg whites) or didn’t know what to look for (cookies that would have been vegan except for M&Ms added to them). I really felt bad turning that stuff down, but I worry that if I am lax about things now, why should I expect her to understand if later I won’t eat the same things? It’s a whole other ball game with my immediate family though because they barely know what veggies & fruit are, let alone a vegan diet 😉
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The same thing happened to me with my MiL this summer. The black bean burgers had milk and eggs. I felt so bad! But, like you, I don’t want to be lax about things now.
Steven heard that M&Ms are not even vegetarian because the M is written with gelatin. Have you heard that? I wonder if it is (still?) true.
LOL @ fam not eating veggies and fruit! I know people like that too 😉
I think that was sort of rude! I don’t know why people get so defensive when you politely turn down food when they KNOW you don’t eat animal products. It’s like they take it personally….
I think labels are sometimes helpful because you can use it to easily explain to people what you do/don’t eat. I think if you wrote that post, you should publish it 🙂 It’s your blog and you should feel comfortable expressing yourself!
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That is actually my EXACT view on labels. I find them helpful. Maybe I WILL work on that post some more 🙂
I’m not a vegan, but still turn down a lot of offered food just because it doesn’t fit within what I want to eat at that moment. I used to feel bad, but eventually I realized that as long as I was polite, then I had done my part.
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I’ve been thinking about this a lot myself, especially with the Vegan challenge I’ve been doing. I think what’s important is, as you say, the difference between ignoring something and being unaware of it. I’m not going to beat myself up if I eat an energy bar and then see that it had whey or milk in it. The point of being vegetarian, or Vegan, it seems to me at least, is not perfection, but rather striving to do everything you can, but knowing that you CAN’T do everything and that you will make mistakes and slip up.
That said, to me, there’s a big difference between slipping up with a baked good that has eggs in it, and slipping up with a hamburger every now and then.
I don’t think that people who occasionally eat meat should call themselves vegetarian, but if a vegetarian unknowingly eats a soup that contains chicken broth, I don’t think that makes them any less of a vegetarian.
That said, knowledge is power, and if you don’t ASK about certain foods (like soups and baked goods), you’re bound to have more “slip-ups.”
I’ll definitely be writing more on my thoughts about this at the end of the challenge…it’s definitely given me something to chew on (no pun intended 🙂 )
I got the Tal Ronnen cookbook for Christmas, but I haven’t cooked from it yet. Everything looks really good, but it’s quite gourmet! I’m saving it for when I want to cook a fancy pants meal 🙂
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I think we have the exact same viewpoint. Instead of publishing my draft, I should just publish this comment! Thank you! 🙂
I think labels are important in this case because you are letting people know about what you do eat and what you don’t eat. Whether you have slip ups or not. I don’t eat fish, so if someone offered me a fish dish, or even something like a ceasar salad with anchioves in it, I would turn it down. I would appreciate the offer, but if you don’t eat it, you don’t eat it.
I think a vegetarian who occassionally eats meat is really a flexitarian – or so I think.
Maybe it’s just me, but I find it way bizarre that your co-worker offered you a dish with chicken broth in it.
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interesting– i agree with you. i don’t think you should call yourself something if you aren’t truly that at your core. it’s sort of like over-diagnosing. heh. i think if you eat fish and call yourself a vegetarian then it is closer to true. i mean they came up iwth all those words for a reason… “pescetarian”? etc. it seems overkill, but we feel the need to label everything and its mother. if you are going to be “vegan” then don’t eat meat. if you want to eat meat then don’t be a vegan! i feel like it is pretty simple. lol. i think the 99.9% is my perfect descriptor. if i’m going to “do it” then i am going to “do it.” and that is that. i dont’ feel bad turning people down. it is my life and my body and i only feel bad when they feel genuinely bad. in which case i go on a more lengthy explanation and try to put it in perspective.
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Oh Kim I am working on the traveling and eating post and yet this post totally ties in with what I am talking about as well! It’s the same concept, having to turn down food because you don’t want it. It’s hard to do that to someone.
Was the coworker who made the soup call her self vegan? Because she could of used wine! 😀
I hate labels because I think they are too restricting and can be harmful. Some people like them because it reassures themselves who they are and what they stand for. I guess I don’t really need that, I know me pretty well. 😀
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That sounds like it will be a great post!
This coworker DID call herself vegan, a vegan who occasionally eats fish (?), meat (?), eggs and dairy (???). She did it for health reasons, and fell off the diet.
I don’t use a label to reassure myself, but to tell people how I eat. I like to use it as a communication tool. And since I believe in veganism, I do not feel restriction at all. BUT, I do understand how MANY feel that way.
why would they ask if you’re THAT strict? you’re vegan, that’s it. you don’t eat certain things. and you’re not going to “cave” to a “slightly vegan” soup. That’s weirdddd!
pb and celery is quite tasty. especially using the celery hearts. tender. delicious. no raisins for me tho!
re: peer editing. we had to write a narrative essay, and then peer edit someone else’s. it’s hard work, peer editing someone’s paper when you don’t understand what’s going on!
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Well I definitely think you ARE eloquent with words. 🙂
I turn down food (at the office, most often – hell, wasn’t I just the one who brought in cookies?) simply because they aren’t healthy, and I’m not hungry. I am ALWAYS scared i will hurt someone’s feelings – that is never my intention. But I will just be honest and tell them I’m not hungry, but might have some later (they usually forget and so do I!), or maybe I just had a meal.
I think this day and age, people SHOULD be understanding about accepting/turning down food – for whatever reason! My poor nephew is allergic to everything under the sun, and he’ll be turning down things constantly in his life. People don’t judge him for that….so why should they judge vegans, vegetarians, or people who just are trying to be healthy?
Wow, Holly – much to say? 🙂
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I don’t think you should feel bad AT ALL. She used chicken broth.Hell, if you were solely a vegetarian it would still be not edible for you. That’d be like me saying to my sister who has a wheat allergy- oh I only used one cup of wheat flour but the rest is spelt so it’s ok! Um, no.
Although I consider myself a vegan, I do eat honey on occasion. I won’t go and buy a jar of honey, but if it happens to be in granola or bread, then I will probably eat it. Now as far as dairy and eggs go, I read labels like crazy to avoid eating them, but sometimes still do by accident. When I first became vegan, I quickly learned that casein, whey, and egg whites make their way into MANY foods, so I am much more careful these days.
If someone offers me non-vegan food, I will politely decline and I usually don’t feel bad about it. Most people don’t push food on me (with the exception of my grandmother), so it has never been a problem. Great post! 🙂
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I do think it’s bizarre that your coworker even brought the soup to work to share with two vegans if it had chicken broth in it. I’m going to guess she doesn’t really understand veganism?
I think labels can be helpful shorthand when you want to explain why you don’t or can’t do something. For instance, I will turn down anything made with Splenda or sucralose or any other artificial sweetener if I know in advance it’s made that way. I just hate the aftertaste and I don’t think they’re good for you anyway. But there’s no easy way for me to say I’m a _______ and let people know in advance that I won’t eat it. I felt really bad at a friend’s Christmas party where everyone brought desserts. Two of the couples brought “sugar free” desserts and I turned them both down. I sometimes feel like saying “I don’t like that” is worse than saying “I can’t eat that”.
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It’s really hard turning someone down.. but in my opinion if it doesn’t fit in my guidlines of eating than I am sorry but no thank you. We were recently at a friens house for lunch (and of course I can’t write this on my blog cause she reads it) and she had made cheesecake… so I wanted to be nice and said ok i have small piece.. well I took the first bite and it tasted different I asked her what is in the ingredient list and she said 2 pkg of creamscheese and 1 pkg of cool whip.. mixed together and put into a pie shell… well I know cheesecake is not healthy but there is something about just eating creamcheese by spoonful….
I have been having a hard time visiting friends lately simply because I don’t want to constantly ask what’s in the ingredient list. I invite them over before I go to their hosue this way I have a control over what I am eating. I know I can’t continue this for ever but for the time being it is working.
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As you know, this is a big subject for me. I HATE turning down food when it’s offered because I feel so guilty, BUT I am very particular. I don’t eat meat, and I prefer to eat vegan. Throw in some lingering anorexia issues and I’m just not the person you want to invite to dinner 😉 I tend to avoid social things sometimes because of this. I’m hoping to gain confidence in just stating what my preferences and beliefs are. People can think what they will, but I know what works for me and makes me feel healthy and good. I think it’s about setting aside others’ opinions… I know some people would disagree with me on that and say you should have “relaxed” (as if veganism is unrelaxed) and eaten what you were served. I think that’s silly. I guess I’m not a big fan of social “rules” 🙂
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I’m not sure why the person would expect you to even taste it if it was made with chicken broth. If you started making exceptions, where would it end? I’m sure it would become something that you would only be able to do at home if you sometimes made exceptions and tried things people made even if it doesn’t fit with your beliefs. I don’t get the whole thing about people caring what other people eat all the time though. There is probably nothing that is more of a nonissue in our house. You eat when you are hungry, eat what you want and no one makes a big deal. When my son was vegan we had fun trying out new things but no one made a super big deal about it (in our house). When he went to a friend’s house he always came home sort of upset because people tried to push food on him and made him feel super self conscious about not eating it.
When I was on the low iodine diet before the radiation, I had to be on a strict diet of no iodine (or as little as possible anwyay). People did not understand it at all and kept offering me things they KNEW were not acceptable. It was very annoying and also I was thinking “sure, I’ll eat it and then my radiation won’t work as well, it isn’t like anything important is a stake here”. I did not make exceptions and I don’t think you should either. But I still felt bad turning people down even though really it should have been them feeling bad for continualy offering me things they knew I couldn’t/wouldn’t eat.
I’m a vegetarian and get the same comments when I refuse soups with chicken stock. No, I won’t eat it. Why is it so hard to understand? And why be so offended? I’m not turning it down because YOU cooked it, get over it. People are SO touchy when it comes to food.
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I turn down food thats processed or made with sugar. Ive cut out anything processed, and sugar.
I feel bad sometimes, but I know these things werent made specifically for me (if they were I would eat a little just out of appreciation) so that makes it a little easier.
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I had a friend whose parents raised her as a vegetarian. Once she moved out she would occasionally eat chicken. Whenever she came to my parents’ house for dinner, we would always make sure to offer her something else, even if it was just grilled cheese or a peanut butter sandwich. We knew that she was a vegetarian, so we were never offended when she passed on certain dishes. It’s a choice. It’s not our choice, it’s her choice. Why should we belittle her decision to be (mostly) vegetarian?
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Like you, I would feel a bit bad about turning down something like that but at the same time.. she knew you were vegan. Declining something with chicken in it shouldn’t be considered strict at all! Chicken = meat. Meat = not vegan/not even vegetarian.
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Yikes. I have a really hard time turning down something if someone made it for me, but I couldn’t consume something with chicken broth in it.
I’m not perfect. I’d say I’m 95% vegan and 5% vegetarian, some of that 5% being ignorance on my part and the other part of it being when someone is trying to do something nice for me (which is rare, luckily), but a meat based broth isn’t even vegetarian!
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I like the footnotes! Jen Lancaster style!
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Hi…first off, thank you enormously for your kind comment yesterday. My goodness, it was beautiful and i truly appreciate it.
Next, i do enjoy your blog. I am not sure if you are the one pictured at the right or left above…anyway, i admire your athletics…i miss that and applaud it in you.
Interesting post. I am not vegan. As for turning down food, its hard to strike the balance. I try not to obsess or be picky, but obviously sometimes you might just need or want to turn things down. Nice topic.
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Good for you, Kim! I appreciate someone who sticks to her (or his!) guns. In answer to your question, I sometimes feel bad turning down food, but it’s a rare occasion (the feeling bad part, not the turning down part ;)). Last week a friend brought in some type of cake he had ordered straight from Italy. It didn’t look appealing to me and once I found out it had raisins in it, all bets were off. I felt a little bad turning it down, but I told him about my raisin aversion and he didn’t seem offended in the least. The one time I felt super bad was when I told my MIL I liked Italian beef (I meant to say Italian sausage) and she went ahead and made it. I actually loathe Italian beef and had to turn it down. DIL FAIL.
I think you are completely justified in turning it down. I tried being a vegetarian for a few months, then it all went away when Mr. P went to buy me Veggie Kung Pao, but ends up there chicken in it and I was starving. Lame, no?
I think I wish I were a vegetarian, but I would be an ‘occasional chicken wing’ eater.
I tell people I don’t eat meat, because it’s easier than explaining I only eat chicken. No, I don’t eat turkey-I just don’t like it. I might eat fish, but it’s rare and I don’t seek it out and I don’t really enjoy it. I don’t eat chicken unless it’s boneless and skinless. I don’t like any chicken on a bone-ever. I don’t ever buy a whole chicken.
So—with those kinds of preferences, it’s easier to just tell someone “I don’t eat meat.”
People ask me much too frequently about why don’t you eat this if you eat that.
I don’t want to eat any meat…but I just really really really REALLY love chicken. BUT not if I have to eat it like a savage and rip it off the bones and eat around tendons and stuff. Gross.
And I have to answer the turkey question every single year at a family dinner because noone understands why I won’t eat that bird, but will eat chicken. I don’t LIKE it. That’s all. I just don’t like the taste. Yes, they are similar—but they aren’t the same.
I also avoid eggs and milk – I think they are gross too.
I will eat cheese, but it’s not something I eat often so I don’t really have an issue with it, and I could easily give that up (except on enchiladas-ha!).
I think I’m fairly easy. 🙂
Gena at Choosing Raw recently wrote a thoughtful post on labels that I think you’d enjoy if you haven’t seen it yet.
I’ve been having this same kind of debate with myself since going Vegan for the months of January. If I look on a package and it says “eggs” or “milk” obviously, there’s no way I’m going to eat it. But what about my favorite dark chocolate that is “processed on the same equipment” as milk? (answer: I’m still eating it)
Or when I thought I chose great at an Italian restaurant, only to receive a comment from a reader that most pastas (esp. homemade ones at Italian restaurants) are usually made with egg – just COMPLETELY forgot that might be the case. But I’m new at this, so I guess I need time to figure out where the animal products might be hiding.
I like your idea of not KNOWINGLY eating non-vegan, however. There are so many other ways it can slip into your diet (morningstar, really?) that choosing not to when you can is a great policy.
I will have to look for Gena’s post! Can you send me a link to her blog?
The “processed on the same equipment” remark is there for allergen liabilities. Almost all of the vegans I talk to still eat those items! (And P.S. Did you know that the Ghiradelli semi-sweet chips are vegan?) I definitely do! If I didn’t, there would not be much left for me to eat!
I try to always ask in restaurants, but sometimes, people just don’t know. We have to do the best we can! I recently called the Olive Garden and they said their spaghetti noodles were vegan, but when we got there, they said the penne ones were… I just ate those and didn’t beat myself up over it!
I almost never turn down food because I just feel so bad. I grew up where food was an offering of love and to turn it down would be personally rejecting the giver (as I’m sure lots of people did) and I just can’t seem to shake that mentality. That’s tied directly into why my eating habits/diet go straight out the window at parties, family get togethers, etc. I really need to work on this though, just not sure how to start.
I saw a lot of tips on turning down foods over the holidays. A lot of them seemed to be based around avoidance, or promising that you would try it later… then never really doing it. Not sure how well those work in real life!
Good job sticking to your guns and turning down the soup despite hurting that ladies feelings. I hate that feeling.
That was nice of her to tell you about the substitute. I don’t think I could be a “strict” vegetarian or vegan, hence why I have not committed to lifestyle yet. I think sticking to your guns is important, though the importance of labels strikes me as a bit superficial. (I once had a “flexitarian” and a “choose-atarian” trying to mince words in my office. Puke on my face.)
What is important is that you did what you felt was right!
I was really happy she told me about it, rather than try to deceive me, like many have!
Have you been thinking of going towards a more plant based-diet? (I just wondered, based on your comment). I think it is silly to use those labels in the manner that those people were fighting about them… what is there to fight about?
Well I wrote about why I am a vegetarian a week ago or so and said that I have this “1 time fish per year” allowance. It actually came from my disordered eating past. It was hard to eat normally again and I didn’t want to limit myself because I feared that it would trigger my ED again. But in fact I haven’t eaten fish (or meat) in years and don’t really desire to eat it either. I also think that a person who occasionally eats fish/meat shouldn’t call themselves vegetarians but at the same time I think that labels are kind of silly.
Anyway, I do turn down food with fish/meat but people understand when I explain to them that I’m a vegetarian. I think it’s good that you turned down the soup because chicken stock is so far away from being vegan.
I agree that labels can be too restrictive for those with an ED past. I have read studies that some use the different types of vegetarian diets as a way to further limit themselves (not saying that is what you did). And I think that is why some love/hate the label. They like that it makes it easier for us to communicate, but hate being “restricted” by it. I think everyone just needs to figure out what is right for them… and hope they can communicate it to the masses! 🙂
Great post! I’ve lightened up as a vegetarian. Well, by your writing, I guess I’m a Pescatarian? – will eat fish (and also dairy and eggs). I avoid egg yolks if possible.
I do avoid chicken broth or try to but restaurants don’t tell you it is in the sauce. The server says “yes, it’s meatless” thinking chicken broth doesnt count.
Unfortunately, I love to cook and create and my hubby just WILL NOT eat vegetarian. So I prepare meaty meals for him but resolve myself to a “Pescatarian” diet (pls. correct me if I’m wrong).
I have come across so many people who think because they avoid meat but eat TURKEY.. they are vegetarian. What school do you think they went to?
Pescatarian would be the correct definition for your diet! It seems like a lot of households work this way – one eats (land-animal) meat and the other doesn’t. We used to be like that! We have been together for over 7 years, but Steven became a vegetarian about 4 years ago. It wasn’t that big of a deal?
Ha ha. Last I recall, turkey is an ANIMAL. In fact, it is one of the only “meats” that is still called by it’s animal name! (you know, pork for pigs, poultry for chicken, beef for cows… or is there some turkey code name I don’t know?)
Of course you can call yourself vegan! These incidents are just one time things. No big deal.
The only thing I allow myself to have is baked french onion soup which uses beef broth. I was eating it for years beforehand until i found out so I just allow myself to have it now. I mainly only have it at Panera anyway.
Unfortunately, a lot of Morningstar products are switching from vegan to non-vegan. There was a big uproar about it.