Friday Question 237
Who is your go to helper/problem solver/fixer-upper/figure-outer? Or! Is it you?!
Ha. Mine is sooooo Steven.
“Steven, I can’t connect to the external hard drive! Please show me how to map it again!”*
“Steven, will you help me put air in my bike tires?”
“Steven, I can’t figure out how to open this without breaking it.”
“Steven, my computer is acting funny again.”
“Steven, I broke the kitchen sink. Will you fix it?”
Basically… “Steven, wah wah wah.”
This makes me sound really pathetic, dependent and useless (and anti-feminist)… but I am not. At least, not 100%. Ha! Steven is just a natural problem solver. He loves taking things apart, seeing how they work, and putting them back together. He tries to fix most things himself. So, if he is there… I am going to use his talent. Ha! And if he is not there, I will try to figure it out (maybe I’ll call him once or twice).
But! I got to be the helper yesterday! And it was really rewarding!
Jen called me last night and I asked if I would come over and help her figure out her new CamelBak (Major Side Note: Ahh! Exciting that I have a friend who lives so close and can just call and be all “Hey! Can you stop over?” and I am all “Hellz yeah!”). Which is funny… since I had issues figuring out my Nathan Vest last year. Steven had to help me (obviously) and Bobbi helped me adjust it on my first run.
When I was leaving to go to Jen’s house, I said to Steven, “It’s kind of funny that Jen is asking for my help since I suck at figuring things out!” Steven was like, “Yeah, I was thinking the same thing.” Ha.
But! Together we figured it out! So, ha! I am not completely useless. And! I can be calm and work through a problem without giving up… maybe it helped that it wasn’t my problem? Hee hee hee.
*I remember this now.
Themocracy
This makes me laugh so hard because I’m the exact same way with Jay!!! Hahahaha. And if he can’t/won’t do it then I defer to my dad. I’m sure they both love it. 🙂
Oh yes! It was my dad until I moved in with my husband. I got in big trouble for calling my dad asking for help with my car after I got married. Whoops. Old habits die hard?
Ah! For techie stuff I def turn to Max. for ANYTHING else it’s always me-even in my family it’s always be. Guess I’m super smart 😉
SUPER DE DUPER SMART!
hah good post. I usually whine to Kevin first, but then try to figure it out myself…to the point of pushing him away when he tries to jump in and help.
I singlehandedly fixed our front load washer when the bellows broke. I had to take it almost all apart to replace it. I was pretty proud of that. 😉
At work I am the problem solver. Especially with computer stuff, which is funny because we have an IT person.
Damn! Can you come fix my washer next time it’s all clogged up from someone washing the bath mats?
Sigh. It is amazing the different levels of computer competency. I am actually pretty good at certain things… and wow. Just wow. Some people barely know how to use them.
I rely on my husband a LOT to do things. Actually it goes like this: in a desire to be independent, I try to do things myself. I usually mess them up and then my darling hubby has to clean up my mess AND fix the original problem.
He’s so lucky to have me.
We have the very same relationship. I fear putting new things together. Brian LOVES it!!! My dependence on him fixing most anything is so apparent that Jakob now knows when anything breaks Papa will fix it!! Poor Brian usually arrives home at night with a greeting of all the toys that need immediate repair 😉
I’ve learned to fix a lot of little things since living by myself and before that living with other girls but I still get Matt to help me with a lot of things. But I still have to do all the “gross” things because Matt has a weak stomach. Sometimes I do fix things for him though, like the one time he tried to tell me his car door was broken because it only opened from the outside and I just flipped the child safety lock off to fix it.
Victory for you! CamelBak 0, Kim 1. (And I’m the same way with Tyler…totally helpless I tell you!) 🙂
I don’t know that it’s anti-feminist – you just recognize each other’s strengths. There’s stuff that I could do myself, and have before since I lived alone for a while and wasn’t dating anyone for a while, but Bob just does it better and more quickly. And he likes the challenge (like the grueling week he spent fixing our kitchen sink). We have our roles. He’s the fixer and I’m the finder. Because at least once a day Bob’s like “Have you seen….?” or just pacing around looking for something, and I almost always know where to find it. I can’t even imagine how much time he spent looking for stuff before we met.
Thanks for bringing up this point, because I was going to add a paragraph about being in relationships and strengths and weaknesses… and forgot. Derp.
Happy to help 🙂
“I can’t even imagine how much time he spent looking for stuff before we met.”
I wonder this about my husband, too.
I like to think I can solve a lot of problems on my own… but, I often ask Joey for help if I am at a loss. If it’s a household item that needs repair (or to be installed as with our new appliances last year) I usually ask Joey if his BIL or dad can assist. I also ask my dad because he’s quite handy!
I ask Ian for help with computer-related stuff and some apartment things because he is so much better at fixing stuff than me. I get frustrated really quickly and want to give up but Ian is so patient and does a great job.
Ha! A couple weeks ago, I came home from strength on a Wednesday and John had taken apart our kitchen floourescent light, replaced the balast (I think that’s how it’s spelled) and NOW I COULD SEE IN MY KITCHEN AGAIN. That’s super important – to be able to see in your kitchen – in case you were wondering.
I get intimidated by all of that. John used to be a bit more reluctant, but after finishing the basement he’s pretty gung ho about it all.
And yeah – I ALWAYS asked my Dad. He’d make me help, but he’d get it done…now when John’s unsure, HE asks my Dad 🙂
We’re funny in this sense where most of the time figuring stuff out and putting it toghether is “Keith! Help with ____” but if he gets frustrated it’s the opposite. I don’t even know how we make that work, but we do.
I find this hilarious. Mostly because I am the problem solver and Mark is the problem creator. The only exception is in terms of electronics and then I freak the heck out. For example, we were building a raised garden bed, which required lumber, screws and a drill. I selected all of the materials and was the go-to person for using the tools. In fact, if anything requires a tool, Mark will pass along the duty to me. And to further illustrate our role reversal, he does 90 percent of the cleaning though I do cook and refuse to take out the trash.
That is not typical that you are more comfortable with tools! I should do a FQ asking about all these stereotypical role reversals. Steven does all the cooking. Eff that. I suck at it and don’t enjoy it!
google and a creepy craigslist ad
I am a pretty good figure-outer but my husband is totally my go to, I am having a freakout moment and need to calm down person. He has this amazing ability to get me to look at something rationally and calm the eff down. I can get wound up easily so it is nice having someone like him around.
Everyone needs someone like that! Well, everyone who freaks out (that would be me!).
It is funny you posted this because I have been noticing that since the BF moved in, I go to him with a lot of things that i used to do myself. It isn’t that I can’t do them, but it is faster and easier if he does them.
Delegation at its finest!
Daddy….he’s a retired farmer and lives 500 miles away so I only see him about once every 3-4 months…so I’m constantly adding to my Daddy-do list so it’s ready for him…he likes putting around the house and fixing things….I love it because things get fixed that maybe don’t need to be fixed right away….but I’m the first one to shout out to Daddy when I fix something on my own….changing a flat tire…fixing the toilet….and I know that makes him smile just as big!
Yes! You have to make your dad proud!
LOL. My snis was having my dad fix things at her house last week when we were all there, I think. 🙂
LOL I do the same thing to Rich… and it’s always… “Rich, can you do me a favor??”
Ha, it is ME. Love solving some problems! I am the resident fix-it, my husband does the laundry and mops so I am winning! 🙂
I definitely turn to my husband for most things…every once in awhile I can be the helper!
Awesome your hubby helps you like
That. Mine is the same. It’s great!
Similar to Anne, Jason is the fixer and I am the detail oriented person in our house. I mean, sure, I could figure a lot of stuff out on my own (and sometimes Jason makes me) but it’s just faster if I ask him to do it. Especially because he gets a little thrill out of improving something!
It’s me and I wish those that asked me to help would find others. I think part of it is that I am too nice and rarely say no. But over the last few years, I’ve had to tell people no. Most of it is due to the fact that I am burnt out, but also there are some who I only hear from when they have a computer issue. They never call me to go have a drink or to chat about other subjects.
I sometimes offer to help others. And most of the time, that’s for people that never ask me for help and are friends that we have so much else in common and do, that the rare computer issue, I am more than happy to offer my help. Also, I know they respect my time and won’t ever abuse it.
That is a total bummer that some of your acquaintances ONLY call you for help, and not just to socialize. I can’t believe they don’t realize how uncool that is!