Friday Question #133
Update on last week’s Friday Question about updating cell phones… I broke mine on Sunday and Steven picked out this new one for me on Tuesday. Ironic, no? But, true to my word, I didn’t care about the technology of the new phone. Steven just went to the store and got what he thought was the best one for me. Would you let someone else pick out your new cell phone?
This Friday Question is a draft post I started on April 1! My perspective has changed a bit from what I first wrote, so I updated it.
Does sharing your personal goals make you feel more encouraged to meet them? Or does it make you feel more pressured to meet them? Do you keep some goals private?
Personal goal – teach Data to use the toilet. Ha! Just kidding. I just wanted a picture for the post and thought that would be funny. Hey look – there’s my old phone! Aww.
I know there are many studies out there that say sharing personal goals with people can help you stay on track with meeting them. And in the blogosphere, people are sharing goals all the time.
I’ve found that for me, sharing certain goals helps me meet them, but some goals are better kept private.
Sharing exercise goals helps me meet them. I feel encouraged to update people on my progress and that keeps me motivated. But sharing weight loss goals does not help me meet them. I don’t mind talking about it, but it just doesn’t help. Sharing what I will call “character” goals – things I want to change about myself – while making me feel better, doesn’t seem to help me meet them either. And work/professional goals? Ha, do I even have them? (No)
And I am all about altering goals. Didn’t meet it this month (weight loss)? I will next month. Wasn’t able to do it last year (run a marathon)? I’ll do it this year. That sorta thing. I’m really forgiving with myself. Is that good or bad?
And I am not sure if I have ever kept a “secret” goal – I am an open person and like to babble, it’s just that there are some things I babble about less than others.
Themocracy
Test comment
I can’t do anything secret because for sure I would just end up talking about it anyway. That being said, I haven’t told many people I am going back to school. I just feel like since I haven’t decided for sure if it will be something I stick with or whatever, I don’t want to say I am doing it only to then say nevermind. My oldest and I just talked about that this morning just a few minutes ago. She asked if it was a secret that I was going back to school and maybe being a nurse eventually, and I told her its not at all a secret, just something I am not planning to share without it coming up naturally.
Sometimes I think telling people I am going to do something forces me to do it. I can’t stand people who say they are going to do something and then don’t so because of that, once I say I will do something there would have to be a HUGE reason if I didn’t. That’s why when I first started thinking about triathlons, I signed up and told a bunch of friends. That way when I tried to talk myself out of it because I was scared, I couldn’t.
About phones…I have never chosen my own phone. I don’t care much at all and have rarely ever used my phone anyway except now that I have an iphone I don’t know if I would want to live without it.
I can’t stand people who say they are going to do something and then don’t
I’m just like you, Tori. Drives me crazy!!
I think it’s one thing to have a goal and work toward it and show progress. Even if you have to change the “due date”, as long as you’re still working towards and showing progress it it doesn’t bother me as much. But if you say “I want to do _____” or “I’m going to do ____” and then never follow through, well, what was the point of telling people?
I make my goals, like my bathroom habits, pretty public. But that’s just me. I find that I get more support that way and am held accountable. If I don’t reach a goal, no one is really let down but me.
I tend to keep some secret goals every so often. It stresses me out if others know and I feel accountable. I don’t want to let anyone else down!
I would probably let someone choose a phone for me.. as long as I looked over the options too and agreed with them.
I think it could be good or bad forgiving yourself for too easily. As long as there is a balance between not ever accomplishing goals and being too hard yourself, then it works out. 🙂
I do a little of both. I have shared goals publicly but a lot of personal goals I discuss with close friends and my therapist. Though, on the whole, I’m an over-sharer.
If it’s a goal I know I’ll have a tough time with, I mouth off as much as possible. When I signed up for Chicago, the very first thing I did was to tell everyone I know. Sometimes this lazy procrastinator needs a bit of public pressure to help her finish!
John always picks out my phones. I am technology stupid most of the time, and I trust him.
I showed half naked pics of me on my site over a year ago to motivate me to work out more. It didn’t help like I thought it would. Sharing that goal is still something I don’t regret, but I would like to see if multiple goal sharing to others would help keep me accountable – at least to myself.
As for picking a cell phone for others, I’ve done that for my daughter. She trusts my techie judgement. But for me, I don’t want anyone picking out a phone for me. I’m too techie minded to wonder if someone else would make the same decision I would.
What do you think would motivate you now Marty?
Hm, I don’t think I would let someone else pick out my cell phone. I hate technology and need things simple. If I let Lawrence pick it out, for example, he would pick something with bells and whistles I would never, ever use.
As for goals… I think I make known most of them, even when I tell myself to keep it private, to “protect” it. As I’ve realized there’s nothing shameful about slipping up or missing a goal, I’m less secretive. I’m much more of an open book in general (except in the workplace. haha)
I wished my cats used the toilet. HA! I think only 2 out of the 3 could do it. Data’s face cracks me up! I am shy to share some goals, I feel that if I don’t meet them it is like failing, and out there for all to know. Then again, maybe it would motivate me to stick to it.
i share all my fairly minor goals – eg working out more, being able to do x amount of pushups, donating to charity every month, etc. but Life Sized Goals, like involving me making sweeping changes / becoming accountable in my professional life / huge goals? i tend to keep those private so i don’t fail publically if i don’t follow through 😉
I definitely couldn’t let someone else pick out my phone. I’m such a gadget geek!
I share a lot of goals, but just like you, there are some goals that it just doesn’t help me to share. It’s not that I’m unwilling to talk about them; it’s just that there’s no benefit.
I think forgiving yourself and moving goals into the future is fantastic! We’ve all set goals that we didn’t meet. Beating ourselves up is just silly and keeps us from being happy…in my opinion anyway.
I love Data’s expression. He doesn’t look receptive to the toilet idea! 🙂
I’m a big goal guy, but there are some that I don’t share for sure. Most of those are career or other. BTW, talked about this a bit today in my race preview!
http://www.theboringrunner.com/2010/10/rock-and-roll-denver-marathon-race.html
Thanks Adam! 🙂
I share my goals with anyone who will listen. They are actually taped to the wall in my office right now. No one here has commented, but I’m sure they think I’m crazy. That sort of accountability gets me through the more annoying training sessions.
Adam from theboringrunner.com pointed me to your blog. I like it!
Thanks for visiting Chad! I am off to check out your blog…
I think those motivation boards (or goal boards) are actually a great idea!
I am with you on keeping some goals private. My exercise and running goals I share, my weight loss goals I don’t. Maybe there’s a reason why I am successful with my exercise goals and not so successful with my weight loss goals!
LOL at Data. Silly kitty. There is no way in hell I would let someone else pick out my phone. That sounds dramatic. Okay I probably would if I had to but I wouldn’t be happy about it.
I like to share my goals- I do think it makes me more accountable. That is part of the reason why I love blogging! 🙂
Accountability is big for me! I share my monthly treadmill goal and it works really well-I really pushed myself late last month to make that goal because I didn’t want to have to type up a blog post saying I missed my goal (again). I don’t go all crazy and share my weight loss goals or anything, though maybe if I did I might be more successful!!