My inner feminist is offended
The December issue of Shape* has an article titled “Eat what you want and still lose weight!” with nine somewhat tired strategies to “celebrate the season without feeling deprived – and may(be) even drop 5 pounds in the process!”
Ha. Ha ha.
Tip #8, “Keep Your Focus” is about not being preoccupied when you eat. “Give your full attention to the conversation or sit down to concentrate on the food in front of you – you’ll appreciate it more.”
Makes sense, right? But then they throw this in:
Where you sit a dinner matters too. Try snagging the chair next to your brother’s cute friend: A new study published in the journal Appetitefound that women who ate in the presence of a man consumed 358 fewer calories than when they dined with a group of women. Researchers at Canada’s McGill University say women often suppress their eating in front of a person of the opposite sex.
Okay. This struck me the wrong way. It’s all fine and dandy if this study is true. BUT, the fact that the magazine is encouraging it?! I think this is something women should get away from! They should feel comfortable eating how they really want to around men. I know the magazine is just including it as a tip, but I think they were better off sticking with “keep your focus” and “be mindful of conversation.”
And, really? I am more self-conscious around some women than men!
What do you think? Do you think the study is accurate? Do you think it’s a good tip? What are your holiday tips for not going overboard with food?
Here’s a tip that wasn’t included: become a vegan so you can’t eat anything at all during the holidays! Ha ha, I am just joking around, but it IS particularily bad at the office holiday potluck. Almost every dish has meat in it. I bring my own food from home for the parties.
Note: After I wrote this, I found an article on the same topic on The Great Fitness Expermient (she pretty much came to the same conclusion as me). I was going to do a similar poll, but decided not to since there was one up there.
*What is with all of the magazine references, Kim?! This is what happens when you have two flights in one day and are stuck in the airport for awhile!
Themocracy
I agree with you. Not only do I think the study is not right, but I think it is wrong to encourage the mentality it’s a good thing to eat less around a man. And by eating less! Men like a woman that doesn’t pick at her food! I don’t think you’re doing yourself any favors when it comes to impressing a man if you pick at your food.
.-= Author’s last blog post… A Sweet End to the Day! =-.
I’m with you – I feel like I eat less around most of my female friends than around “cute guys”. I don’t read magazines/articles like that often though because they always rile me up 🙂
.-= Author’s last blog post… Who says I can’t be free from all the things that I used to be? =-.
Dude, totally not cool. That tip is ridiculous. And it reinforces society’s message that as women we have to rely and look to men in order to even just eat a dinner.
Bah!
I second what Shannon said, dudes like chicks who actually eat stuff!
.-= Author’s last blog post… December 9th, 2009: pull it together =-.
Too sad. I think articles like that really encourage disorderd eating. It is hard enough in the culture we live in to eat in a normal healthy way without having our heads messed up with those kinds of things! Don’t listen, girls, try to enjoy your food, eat when hungry and forget the rest!
.-= Author’s last blog post… Just another day at the gym… =-.
I rarely get all feminist, well let’s say never. But I’m shocked that they would have included this. They could have put “snag a chair beside your brother’s cute friend so that you’ll be so engulfed in flirty conversation that you won’t even think about a second piece of cake” or something cute along those lines instead of that horrid statistic.
.-= Author’s last blog post… Here It Is: My Food Inc Review =-.
I saw that same article, and was annoyed by the tip as well. Regardless of whether or not the statistic is true, I don’t think Shape should be promoting that mentality in their magazine. Plus, I kind of agree with you– I can feel more self concious eating in front of some women than men!
.-= Author’s last blog post… Holiday Light Show Spectacular =-.
Good call on this, Kim! Whether the study is accurate or not, Shape magazine should not be encouraging women to restrict their eating to impress a man.
.-= Author’s last blog post… From Stressed to Rested =-.
what a weird article. exhibit a why i don’t read shape magazine anymore.
I KNOW! i remember watching the movie adn being like. hmmmmm this music would be good to row with, lift iron with !
too bad i don’t have it! i should listen to it and see what i think of it.
the two guys i was working with were like it is the BEST!
hahaha.
.-= Author’s last blog post… i’m the original napster =-.
It is totally a weird “tip”. I find that I eat less at parties where there is a buffet because I don’t want to leave the conversations I’m in to go back to the food table. Doesn’t matter where I’m sitting!
.-= Author’s last blog post… Last But Fast =-.
I don’t think I eat less at all when out with a guy…I’ve downed full Chipotle burritos while on dates! Boys like girls who eat. 🙂
I would easily believe that women eat less when around men, although I would think it would be more applicable in a date situation versus at the family holiday dinner table.
.-= Author’s last blog post… Ativan, STAT =-.
well if you are sitting next to a cute guy of course you are going to eat less.. its the nerves… its like when you go on a first date you hardly eat anything on your plate…
As far as eating less in front of other girls… I can see it being true and not being true.. I know confusing.. I can totally see myself in a group and checking out everyone’s plate or decision on meal and ordering based on what everyone else is getting..
.-= Author’s last blog post… One more day…. =-.
I could totally see this in a magazine, and you’re right to be put off by it. I think the real shame is all of the girls who will read it and think “Hey, that’s great, I could do that!”
I think I like food too much to limit what I’d eat around anyone 🙂
.-= Author’s last blog post… Runner’s Den / Fiesta Bowl Half Marathon =-.
Wow. I am sometimes surprised at the way some magazines are still reinforcing such horrible stereotypes and standards for women to live up to. It’s 2009, already, people. Sheesh. What does it take? Grumble, grumble. Anyway, I had to laugh at you saying to just become vegan because then you can’t eat anything. That is how I felt when I first went vegan too and I was also avoiding anything with soy in it, which believe me, is really difficult since it is in almost everything in some form or another. I found that chickpea salad sandwiches and fresh crudites were my favorite standby food because they are quick to make and/or take anywhere. 🙂
I get annoyed with some of Shape’s suggestions/tips; they don’t always seem very realistic or like this one a bit offensive. But there are women who will follow it.
.-= Author’s last blog post… Delayed… but now I have time to post! =-.
hahahahaha… I only eat less if I don’t really know the guy. I know I didn’t eat as much and took smaller bites (making me the slowest eater EVER) when I started dating my husband. The 40 lbs I’ve gained show how that didn’t last long.
About your recent vote about responding to comments…. I do this, too, via e-mail. However…. I can’t respond to yours when you post on my blogs! You’re missing out on scads of additional witty comments!
.-= Author’s last blog post… Dog News =-.
I actually think I eat less in front of women. Or no, actually I eat less in front of people who make eating a “thing”. If someone is obsessing over what they are eating or has been talking about being careful or whatever, I will eat way less than I would normally have eaten at that time. I guess I feel like they would judge me or think I was “less than” if I wasn’t worried too? I don’t do it on purpose, but I have one friend that if I go out to dinner with her, I come home and am hungry just about an hour later because I haven’t eaten enough. She is constantly talking about how this food isn’t good for you, or this food has a lot of fat, etc. That isn’t necessarily a bad thing, it’s good to know what is in your food, but it sort of stresses me out and makes me think I need to be careful so the person doesn’t think I am some sort of pig or something.
Anyway, the study is kind of sexist for sure. As my oldest has been getting older, things like this bother me where I don’t even think I would have noticed before. I always think I worry way more about my kids than I ever have about myself so I guess it makes sense. I don’t want my daughters to hear messages like that and believe them!
Bah humbug at that study! I am a big eater and I never modified that around guys to try to impress them or act a certain way. I wish we had lots of guys around here to ask this question to so we can see what they think about pick at their icerburg girls versus enjoying a balanced meal girls. That study sounds like something they would have told women back in the 50s, after the tip to make sure and cook dinner in pearls and look presentable for your husband when he gets home from work.
.-= Author’s last blog post… 3 Things Thursday =-.
Yeah. I wish I had some male commenters.
One of the many reasons I like your blog! I read this article and that tip struck me as just plain silly. “Hey ladies, really turn the guys on – don’t eat!” My boyfriend was saying what a turn-off it is when girls sit there and pick at their food. We do not need to perpetuate the idea that women should starve themselves (around men or not) to be attractive.
That tip sounds like something you’d read in a magazine from another era! It’s ridiculous! I have always eaten a lot and been a huge foodie, whether men are around or not. Previous boyfriends have joked about strapping a feedbag on for me.
My inner-feminist comes out rarely but those Reebok EasyTone commercials bring her out ranting and raving. Have you seen them? (Sorry, slightly off topic!)
.-= Author’s last blog post… Yummy Soup and a New ‘Do =-.
I haven’t seen the Reebok commerials. Should I keep an eye out for them, or will I be enraged?
I also get VERY UPSET when I see commercials that are sexists about men – you know, men can’t clean, men can’t cook, blah blah blah. That’s not fair to them.
argh. whether the study is accurate or not, it’s shape’s tone / inference that’s infuriating: that i would want to use a cute boy to affect my eating habits. if i want to eat less / eat healthier / whatever? fine. if i’m only doing it to impress some cute guy? ARRGHH RAGE THROW THINGS 🙂
.-= Author’s last blog post… my first vlog! featuring oliver the cat =-.
LOL – I am dyin’ over here!!! Seriously?! So, the key to losing weight is to surround yourself by men?!
Not only do I think this is an unhealthy way to approach eating, for me it’s just not true. I’m more likely to eat a greater volume of food around MEN than women. As other people noted, men like women who EAT! Around women (certain ones), I actually tend to get a little self-conscious.
And is it me, or is anyone else sick of the “How to eat well over the holidays” articles? I mean…it’s usually the same thing, in every single article!
.-= Author’s last blog post… It’s My Hump Day! =-.
Oh yes. I am SO SO SO sick of them. I get sick of them EVERY year. It’s the same thing over and over and over… and I really think it is something you work towards. Reading an obvious tip does not help me. I have to be in a healthy place with food to being with!
I with ya, I am more self conscious eating in front of another female than a male. Especially if I clear my plate and the other female does not. But, the be mindful of your food is a pretty good tip – that and not eating in front of the tv.
I think that’s a bullshit tip to give women. It just perpetuates the whole beauty myth and that thin is prettier and that women shouldn’t eat actual food. UGH! It pisses me off.
To avoid excessive eating around the holidays I like to be sure to bring foods I can eat to any party or gathering, if I make anything sweet I give it away so there is none of it in the house, and I make sure to get some exercise (make it fun with the family like go for a walk or chase my nephew around).
.-= Author’s last blog post… Up Date =-.
OH MY GOSH! This kind of thing is so frustrating. I wish Western women weren’t so focused on every little calorie they consume and every extra bit of fat on their bodies. It’s so damaging! No wonder 6-year-old girls in this country think they’re fat and that they need to be on diets. I can understand eating less because you’re seated next to someone you find interesting to talk to — but why does it have to be some cute guy? Why can’t it be a fascinating older woman? Or your 9-year-old niece? Jeez. Personally, I think you should eat around some cute guy whatever you’d eat normally. I’d like to think that all the nice, normal, reasonable men out there would want you to enjoy a good meal and wouldn’t focus on what or how much you’re eating.
I am definitely more self-conscious around my female friends. That article is ridiculous!
.-= Author’s last blog post… Christmas List =-.
I will get all feminist because I proudly call myself one. Crap like this is why I hate Shape, Self, and just about every “woman’s magazine” out there. Every article in these magazines is all about dressing for your man, pleasing your man in the kitchen, pleasing your man in bed, lose weight for your man, be skinny so men will like you, etc…If these magazines were truly “women’s magazines” they would focus on women being healthy for themselves, women pleasing themselves with healthy meals in the kitchen, and leaving men out of it totally. So frustrating.
.-= Author’s last blog post… Three Things Thursday =-.
My outer feminist is offended.
I’d be curious to pick apart the original research. Did they eat less because they wanted to seem appealing to a man or did they eat less because the dude was so quiet they had to keep up the entire conversation and never got the chance to eat? Context is everything.
.-= Author’s last blog post… Heifer International =-.
i try to just treat the holidays like any other time when i’ve got yummy delicious food all around me – the hard part is being away from my home, where i’m used to cooking for myself all the time!
Ok, seriously I agree. I am way more aware of what I eat in front of women than I am in front of men. The fiance could care less if I eat 358 more calories, so yeah, that doesnt stop me lol.
PS-I love the new headermast! Hilarious picture!
.-= Author’s last blog post… Yet Another Holiday Function =-.
I have that Shape magazine and I don’t remember that part at all…I don’t know if I ignored it or skipped that part.
I think it is ridiculous and I agree it should have been left out. I remember once going on a date with a guy and him telling me how much he liked it that I actually ate and didn’t just order lettuce and water!
.-= Author’s last blog post… Jolly contract =-.
I’ve read suggestions like that before, and they really kind of rub me the wrong way too. And I definitely watch what I eat around girls. One time, I went to an Indian buffet, and I PILED all this food on my plate. Then I looked over and saw that my dining companion had like four noodles and all this space on her plate.
I was pretty embarrassed, but also, Indian food is delicious so I ate it all without remorse. Mmm!
.-= Author’s last blog post… Lots of pictures for the ADD. =-.