My problem is… I crave instant gratification. I want to be doing what I want, all the time. I want to have what I want, instantly. I want to be who I want to be, right now.
So, I’ve identified the problem. I just need to figure out how to tackle it.
Hi! I'm Kim, a 34-year-old living in Chicagoland with my husband, Steven, and our cats, Khali, Apollo, and Starbuck. I work in the design industry (architecture), follow a vegan lifestyle, am addicted to running, and am an ACE certified personal trainer (working at Essential Fitness, LLC ("Efit"))! I write about a variety of topics, and consider this a "life" blog - a place I can share anything that's on my mind. Please visit the "About" page to get a better idea of who I am! :-)
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The secret is to want what you already have and be who you already are. The rest will fall into place.
I have that same problem too and I thought by coming here that you were going to have the solution for me. Thanks for nothing. Sheesh. LOL. Just kidding. 🙂 But seriously, let me know if you figure out how to tackle the problem.
I’m going to add to what Robin said. The way to satisfy the instant gratification is to shift the focus from long term impossible instant things (i.e. you cannot lose 50 lbs over night, you can’t complete a PhD program in a week, etc…) to smaller things. If you complete your run today, you should get the instant gratification from doing so. If you choose a healthy dinner, you should get the instant gratification from being on the right track. Looking for instant gratification in long term things is another way of avoiding looking at yourself in the here and now, and it’s actually NOT about wanting instant gratification. You’re a smart girl, even subconsciously, so feeling that way means avoiding something else. So then… what is it?
I am not good with delayed gratification either. Being happy and content in the here and now is something I’m working on as well…
Don’t forget, some things are well worth the wait. The delayed gratification can be much more satisfying than the instant. It’s also worthwhile to note that SOMETIMES, the thing you think you want in an instant isn’t what will satisfy you in the long term.
I find that the older I get, the more patience I have, and the less I cave in to the immediate rush of the thing of the moment.
Kim i love your blog!!! i can so relate to wanting instant gratification, i have the same “problem”… reading the comments i see that everyone is right, now i just need to work on being content with the gratification for the “here and now”… any ideas?!
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Hear, hear! I’m right with ya. And if you couple that with a ‘Well, heck, you only live once’ sort of philosophy, impulse control can be a real bitch. I totally agree with the idea of breaking things down into manageable chunks and/or seeing one baby step in the right direction as an accomplishment you should chalk up and celebrate a little – you can only know the delayed gratification is coming at all if you are headed in that direction in the first place – relish the process, make it enjoyable, ignore the tedium, have (and think often of your) faith in your efforts so you don’t get discouraged at seeing only slow, incremental progress from day to day. I’m attempting to live that advice these days. It is NOT easy, but you get better with practice.
Robin – And I do feel like I have everything I could ever want. Good advice. I am going to focus on that! 🙂
teeni – LOL! So far, it looks like Robin’s advice was a good start. I will have to see what everyone else has to say… this is what I love about blogging. All the free advice, maybe from people having a “been there, struggled with that!” experience.
Kyra – Ugh. How are you always so right? 😛 I think focusing on the smaller things is a wonderful idea. I am going to start to work on it. And… I’ve always been one to look forward. I do need to start living in the here and now.
suze – I guess we’ll be working on it together 🙂
Odie – That is the thing! When I DO wait for something, it doesn’t kill me. And sometimes, when I get what I want, it doesn’t even make me happy. Patience, I need to work on my patience.
CourtneyInControl – Ideas? I am going to start by focusing on what I do have (like Robin and Kyra suggested). I am going to go home, and really be home… rather than in between, from one thing to the next. What are you going to do?
Catherine – Relish the process. That is what I am going to work on (as well). Well said.
Identifying the problem is the major part of the moving forward in life. Unfortunately, instant is never a factor in getting something to last a while. It’s gone before you know it, and then you are back looking for that issue again.
I’m happy you were able to find the problem. Now for tackling it…. one day at a time, they say.
there are some really good comments here, patients Kitteh, patients and the tenacity to see it through ~ you’ll get there
martymankins – One day at a time is right! Today, I already told myself “no” when I wanted to buy a magazine to read on the train, because I didn’t feel like reading the one I had with me.
de – Someday!