Decline with regret
Mom,
I am not going to my childhood friend’s wedding this weekend. I am honored that she invited me, but I haven’t seen her in at least 6 years, and I feel uncomfortable going to her wedding, and not knowing anyone there. (Yes, I know you and dad will be there. But still.)
I am still coming to town, but I would rather hang out with my sister. Or my brothers. Or my grandparents. Or my aunt. I rarely see them, and they’re family.
I’m sorry I’ve disappointed you,
Kim
P.S. And it’s not like she came to mine!
Editor’s Note: I just had to let that out. I’ve been telling my mom I’m not going to this wedding for quite some time, but I guess she was confused and still thought I was going. Nope! It’s not a big deal, but I feel bad that my mom really wants me to go and I don’t want to go.
Themocracy
Uh oh, Mom was just telling me how you two were making a big deal of this. :-p
Christina – I think she’s upset because she thought I was going. She probably just wanted my company. But I just don’t want to go!
No reason to feel bad about that. Are you sending a gift? Did she send you one?
Be safe getting to Iowa. Many road closures. Cedar Rapids is horribly flooded. My family all live there, and it’s pretty unbelievable. Places I never thought had the remotest possiblity of flooding are gone.
I tend to feel worse when my Mom is involved. She’s got a way to get to me like that!
I always find it strange when people you haven’t seen or really been friends with for years feel compelled to invite you to their wedding. It just makes it awkward for everyone. When I pulled together my invite list, it was all about who I feel is still a friend. No hard feelings for those I’ve lost touch with.
I’m with Nilsa. Someone you’ve not seen in a while wants you at their wedding. There are several motives that go through my head on this one:
1. They are trolling for gifts
2. They feel bad they haven’t seen you a in while and want a nice gift.
3. While seeing your name on the list, they think “Oh no. If I don’t send them an invite, they will think we ignored them and I don’t want to have someone feel left out.” Plus they are curious if you are bringing a nice gift.
or
4. They really are not sure how your name got on the list and will be totally surprised if you showed up or sent a gift.
Moms always know how to play the guilt card. There’s no reason to go to the wedding if you’ve not seen her in a long time. I’m with Nilsa – I invited only people we’ve been in touch with recently and are still friends with.
It is also probably different for your Mom because she is still there. I am sure there are people that she has grown apart from and no longer keeps in touch with but she just did not think of it that way. Oh and on the declining the invite, I think you did the right thing.
kapgar – I sent her a card. She didn’t send me a gift or a card. But that’s no biggie 🙂
Odie – Oh no! I hope your family in CR is okay 🙁 Did any of them have to evacuate? Did you visit to help at all, or is that not advised?
sizzle – Me too. The ol’ mom “guilt trip.”
Nilsa – I think that’s the way to do it. Steven was asking me “Why’d we invite her to OUR wedding if you haven’t talked to her in 6 years?” Yeah, good question!
martymankins – LOL! I hope gifts isn’t ALL that people think about… but I am sure it IS that way for some couples!
suze – That’s what I thought – why go if I haven’t seen her? It’s not like we’re going to have a chance to catch up!
Felicia – Yeah, she still sees this girl’s mom from time to time, so she didn’t feel awkward. I knew I would have, even though my parents were going to be there, and that I wouldn’t have had as much fun!
Honestly, I would’ve made the same decision as you
deutlich – Thanks. I’ve gotta guess… a lot of people wouldn’t want to go in my situation!