Drivers Ed, Part I
You’re driving on a highway in the Chicagoland area, and another driver cuts you off. What do you do?
- Ignore it and slow down.
- Honk your horn and slow down.
- Slow down and get into another lane
- Tailgate them until they get off the highway.
- Zip over into the next lane, get really close to the side of their car, and ride there for awhile while giving them the evil eye, then take off.
- Speed around them really fast, then get in front of them and slam on your breaks.
Did I miss any options?
Themocracy
I would pick #5 and #6. It not only makes the point, but also shows them what a douche they are for driving. 😉
You missed one option… “run them off the road and pat yourself on the back as everyone around you honks in support of your vigilante actions.”
Oh, and that would be my choice.
I think you forgot about the one-fingered salute and the flashing of your brights in their rear view mirror.
My favorite thing around here is when people are in such a huge hurry to pull out in front of you, and then can’t manage to drive more than 10 mph below the speed limit.
Did I mention I have road rage issues?
Ha ha! I love it. It’s about the same in NYC. Except here drivers are much more prone to actually driving their car INTO the offender’s vehicle to retaliate — you know, a gentle “get out of my way” nudge sort of thing.
One of the reasons I really loved driving in L.A. was that everyone was so darn nice. Traffic was not Indy 500 fast, no one honked, and most people would let you over when you needed to change lanes.
Granted, it was mid-day on a Sunday, but still… *sigh*
Get out your Gat? Maybe that’s only in LA? 😉
scream bloody murder even if tho they will never hear a damn word you are saying…
Haha, Marissa said it best about NYC!
Erm… last time I lived in Chicago there was a “pull out a gun and shoot the offending driver” option too.
I was going to say “shoot the offender”, but then I realized that’s more Texas style (my husband agrees–he learned to drive at age 16 in Houston, land of gunracks in pickups).
Then I was going to mention The Bird, but someone else beat me to that one too.
I usually just tell the dude in no uncertain terms that he’s a moron…so everyone else in the car knows. Y’know, in case they missed it. But I’ve only flipped one person off, ever, and I’m afraid to do #s 2-6 because THEY might shoot ME! 🙁
Here are a couple more:
* deploy wheel-mounted “Road Warrior”-style spikes sideswipe them off the road
* get in front of them and deploy banana peels (Mario Kart, anyone?)
* fire off a heat-seeking missile cleverly-installed behind one of your headlights, a. la. James Bond
😛
In reality, I choose one of options #1-3…
Ignor, and don’t even make eye contact! There are some scary people out there these days, it’s not worth it. What happened to me? I use to be so fierce! Oh, yeah, I had 3 kids… heee-heee-heeee!
I always choose the first one. But that’s because I don’t get bothered easily. And also don’t drive too often on the highway. I bet if I drove a lot like my husband, I’d be all angry and tense like he is.
4-6 are typically what I do. I’ve been noticing that I’m a very angry driver lately. Eff’in Chicago traffic!
Ha ha!! I love my boyfriend’s response. 😉
Fucking hilarious! Yes, you missed one I just used the other day. Lean on your horn, give them the finger, flash your brights and yell vulgarities out the window. It might not make them move back to where they came from, but it sure will make you feel better.
HAHAHAHA.
Just had something similar to this happen to me yesterday. I had changed lanes and got behind another car who proceeded to slam on his brakes, come to a complete stop in the middle of the road, and start waving his arms and yelling at me. Guess he didn’t want me driving behind him.
So what did I do? I laid on the horn, got as close to his back bumper as I could without touching it, and as soon as the lane next to me was free I changed lanes and took off like a bat out of hell while my passenger hung out the passenger window flipping him off.